My point is, that when there is no one who has to born, there is no one who has to suffer.
— Antinatalist
This is where I’m curious. This is stating the obvious. Why are you focused on the ‘suffering’ though? Why do you think this justifies stating it is ‘bad’/‘wrong’ to have children. This really doesn’t make sense to me.
It is the parents choice. It is neither ‘right’ nor ‘wrong’. I can certainly imagine individual situations where circumstances may shift someone’s perspective though. — I like sushi
I understand that at times life seems terrible.
A parent who actually thinks about these things and decides to have a child is taking a risk to some degree. Most/any parents will tell you that they want to better themselves for their child. The child also reaps this benefit. It is more of a win win situation than a use use situation.
It is ‘right’ - in terms of ‘selfish’? I don’t think that measures up tbh. In terms of anthropology and modern society children were certainly ‘used’ to look after parents and such in old age. Child mortality was high too. Do we have the right to bring children into the world … sure, as much as we have the right to walk, pee and eat. — I like sushi
If life is valued/celebrated (as it is by myself and yourself) then I don’t see how arguing that we have an obligation to nurture life as any worse of an argument. I don’t believe either is ‘better’ - so to speak - because I’m some kind of absurdist I guess. — I like sushi
I guess all this boils down to is you must think more people suffer a substantial amount more in their lives than those who don’t AND that such suffering is intrinsically ‘bad’. I admit that last part sounds weird because ‘suffering’ isn’t generally thought of as ‘good’, but I mean something more like the use of suffering to fortify yourself for future misfortunes.
A would imagine if we could do a worldwide survey and ask every single human if they wished they’d never been born we’d find those who said ‘yes’ would likely live in a more ‘privileged’ demographic. Who knows though? I would expect most would prefer to have had a life than none at all. — I like sushi
Why is life valuable is kind of a ouroboros. Absurdism it generally where I go.
That´s how people usually think, that it's parents´ choice. But that doesn't make it right.
— Antinatalist
As stated above. Circumstance will lean people more one way than the other. It isn’t right or wrong, any more than being hungry is right or wrong, it is just the state of affairs of humans living a life. We have moved beyond more, how should I put it, more ‘animalistic’ tendencies … or rather we’ve imbued ourselves with certain psychological restraints. I think, for the most part, we’ve learnt to make life better.
I would like to emphasise that a life without suffering (as stated by someone previously) is more cruel than a life with suffering because life requires hardships and strains, humans basically need to strive forward like Sisyphus in order to inhabit what we loosely refer to as ‘meaning’. — I like sushi
Your new comment above about stakes being so high for a new life. This doesn’t add up if you agree that life is valuable and that suffering is a necessary part of life (from my perspective this doesn’t add up at least).
What stakes are high? The chance of suffering? Suffering is inevitable. Life (you agree?) is valuable. Is the value of life to you determined purely by the amount of suffering involved? — I like sushi
My throw away comment about buddhism and nihilism is an obscure view of mine. Fro what I can tell they are two extremes of the same beast. The nihilist perspective expected more from life and then ended up staring down into the abyss. The ‘buddhist’ (loose term) expected nothing of life and stare out of the abyss. Both essentially view the world through the lens of suffering and pain. — I like sushi
Striving is good. Striving requires ‘suffering’. Life requires suffering. Bringing life into the world is for gods/whatever, we merely exist and strive hoping for more tomorrow. Unfounded hope? Possibly … I’d rather not gamble when the stakes are so high (ie. the ‘value’ I habour in life).
Anyway, thanks for persisting. Not sure if you can offer up much more but hope you surprise me. I’m a pessimist so I’m always happy with what comes my way because I’ve learnt to expect far worse :D — I like sushi
it is still wrong because it is a decision for someone else´s life
— Antinatalist
Made by an already living creature towards a "0",non existing one. And which you can never be sure (even if you had the chance) that" kid's answer" would be always a "no". — dimosthenis9
Anyway as I told you I almost played all my cards here and feel like I just repeating same things. And in general spamming is one of the main things that bothers me in TPF. So I don't want to feel that I do the same.
As I told you I respect your opinion even if I totally disagree and I depart peacefully. — dimosthenis9
That is just an absurd statement.
— Antinatalist
No it isn't. It's a statement that you simply can't deny. — dimosthenis9
About utilitarianism, your arguments/reasoning seem strongly as utilitarian.
— Antinatalist
I ensure you I m not at all. Whether you believe it or not. — dimosthenis9
if you look the act of having a child only at parent's perspective, you use the unborn potential person as a mean - not an end itself.
— Antinatalist
The thing is that you look it only at the "unborn kid's" perspective! And don't care at all about parent's perspective. — dimosthenis9
Antinatalist I think you’re the one not listening. I think I can speak roughly for the person above by saying we’re not looking at it purely from the parents perspective. The thing is neither are we looking at it purely from the (possible) child’s perspective. — I like sushi
Again, back to the ‘possibility’ of harm being portrayed as a greater ‘wrong’/‘bad’. This sounds a lot like having ‘safe spaces’ and all that kind of dangerous nonsense.
No one ‘asks’ to be born because that is impossible. The choice, if it exists, is on the parents. — I like sushi
↪Antinatalist You’re strange.
The word choices like ‘playing’ tell me something about you. This isn’t a logical discussion. You have an opinion that, as far as I can see, has little to no weight to it.
The comparison I made was to get the point across that we cannot fear causing ‘suffering’ every step in our lives. Every step in your life will cause ‘suffering’ some where. — I like sushi
By this logic killing all humans will end their ‘suffering’ yet you’re not for murder … guess you’d have another name for it instead, maybe ‘avoiding collateral damage’? — I like sushi
There is nothing wrong with wanting to experience the joys of parenthood anymore than there is with not wanting to. I think anyone trying to take a moral high ground on what is ‘better’ is something close to what I would term ‘evil’. — I like sushi
Life without suffering isn’t worth living. You learn that as you mature. I guess some people get carried away with the search for some ‘answer’ or ‘solution’ to life. Again, as you mature you may see past this (I hope so). — I like sushi
I like humanity. I want it to keep going because I believe human life has value, because I make judgements. I’m not particularly compassionate towards nihilists or buddhists (same difference to me). — I like sushi
Even if you were right, your point of view is some kind of utilitarianism
— Antinatalist
I don't think it is at all. I don't even support utilitarianism. It is just a simple matter of choice for me as I told you. Nothing else.
Yes, I want human race to disappear. By voluntary choice. Not very realistic that this will happen in near future, but I think that way.
— Antinatalist
Ok at least now you admit it. I don't agree at all and I find it irrational. But as I told you I respect every opinion so I respect yours also.
My ethics is to respect people who already exist, their lives have a great value - even when they have bad ones
— Antinatalist
Sorry but it's not the case here either.
You care about the "rights" and "potential suffering" of an "unborn creature" a "0".But you don't give a fuck for the actual suffering of the ones that are already alive! — dimosthenis9
If someone wants to have kids. And he truly wants that with all his heart. That will make him so happy and not having will make him miserable for the rest of his life. Well in that case with your theory you "condemn" a living creature's life into ACTUAL suffering and misery by urging him not to be happy and have kids for the sake of the POTENTIAL suffering of a non existing creature! You value potential suffering of a "0" more that the actual suffering of an already living person. So no, please don't say that. — dimosthenis9
Also their sovereignty as human beings obligates other people not to use them as a mean for something, and same philosophy is also one reason for my antinatalistic views.
— Antinatalist
Yes, my AN is along similar deontological ends. In the end, it's about not using people. Do not foist unnecessary, non-trivial harms/burdens/impositions to someone else. — schopenhauer1
dimosthenis9
303
I would prefer to turn this question upside down. Life is for some people, at least, such a terrible burden that is certainly not worth of living. In earlier post I have touched the problem of suicide in many cases.
— Antinatalist
That upside down thing doesn't answer at all to my question but anyway.
You keep referring to all those who suffer (and there are many indeed). You don't say anything about those who don't see life as suffering at all. And there are also many!
So since some suffer (even if some of those still prefer life as I mentioned to you at previous post) let's not have kids at all from the fear of the potential suffering! Let's end human existence. Sounds logical??
When there are no humans, there are no wars, concentration camps, genocides, famine, rapes and other sexual abuse, any other violence, no suffering for losing your loved ones, physical pain and so on.
— Antinatalist
— dimosthenis9
So you actually admit that you do want Humans to disappear. You just try to present it like a "good", "unselfish", "moral" thing. Sorry but there is no way to accept that. It is totally out of my logic. — dimosthenis9
But I think these good things in life are far from balancing the bad ones
— Antinatalist
Totally disagree. — dimosthenis9
My point of view is that preventing harm is a higher value than bringing happiness.
— Antinatalist
Your point of view ends with the conclusion : that preventing harm is a higher value than life itself at the very end!! And this is something that my Logic fails to follow. It just stops being logic, for me at least. — dimosthenis9
Let´s use "Humanism" I suppose the way you use it (you can correct me if your view is different). It is something good. Something unselfish, peace-loving, something which reach for love and justice.
On that perspective I find antinatalism very humanistic point of view.
— Antinatalist
I used the word humanism here as to describe "human species".People.
How you find antinatalism humanistic(with the way you defined it) since the ultimate result of your theory would be a totally disappearance of humans? An end to human nature?? I really can't understand this.
Doesn't that imply that you find human creatures unworthy of living? Is this a different kind of "love" for humans and I m the only one who doesn't get it? (maybe I am, don't know). — dimosthenis9
Doesn't that imply that you find human creatures unworthy of living? — dimosthenis9
↪Antinatalist Answer me something that I was always curious about antinatalists. I asked the same to Bartricks also.
Let's suppose that the best scenario for you happen. And all people adopt your theory. So at the end your final claim is that humanity should stop existing right?? That no more kids, no more humans.
You find that rational?? It was always one of the main reasons I never could understand that kind of Logic! You find logical humanity to end cause we just "can't ask" an unborn, NonExisting creature?? Really that sounds rational to you??Just asking, really. — dimosthenis9
And at the end since your final conclusion is that. Then why you call yourselves antinatalists and not anti humanists?? It would be a more honest name, imo at least — dimosthenis9
↪Antinatalist Rephrased it reads "I didn't understand the point of the thread, nor properly interpret the OP" Is this literally asking about the morality of producing children? — Cheshire
In case A does not have a child – and the consequence of this choice is that a greater bad will take place than in the event of A having a child – A will still not have actively influenced the occurrence of this bad. Let us now assume the opposite: A has a child, and the consequence of this choice is that a greater bad will take place than in the event of A not having a child. In this case, it is unquestionably clear that A has actively affected the materialization of this bad. — Antinatalist
Strange logic.
— Antinatalist
What? We don't consider the present is exactly the same as the projected future states? How do we pretend cardiac base tissue is a person, by other means? — Cheshire
Or another way. Every living person is a potentially dead person so killing people is ok. — Cheshire
↪Antinatalist My questions remains. How is this different from saying ‘Reasons not to cross a road’ ? — I like sushi
They are very weak points. I can think of better points. For example, people who have children generally suffer more stress and have less ‘happiness’. People who don’t have children though don’t have the elated highs of being a parent.
On balance if you really think having children is bad/wrong/not good, then I don’t understand why. — I like sushi
So is quite understandable that many people, who suffer and are willing to die, don´t make suicide.
— Antinatalist
These cases exist indeed. But many others prefer to go on living even if they suffer cause they still think life is better. Plus when one suffers still he has hope that things will get better and he will overcome it. His hope for happier days is much stronger even from the actual suffering. — dimosthenis9
There are even cases among the ones you mentioned,that people just find excuses to religion and grief of their loved ones cause at the very bottom they don't want to die at all! — dimosthenis9
someone in utter pain isn't going to necessarily be able to wave such things away.. One has to eat.. etc. Joke assume easy-to-deal-with and light. Surely, someone must find ways to live in the word, lest they die (they must "deal with" inescapably lest they die by starvation). Surely, contingent, harmful events might happen to someone as well. Structural and contingent harms happen..That's no joke.
— schopenhauer1
Why you think that a person who suffers (and there might be probably billions as we are talking) don't kill himself?? Cause they STILL answer "yes" to life. Life to most people is much more preferable than "nothing","0", even if they suffer! — dimosthenis9
↪I like sushi
I hadn't been participating in this discussion. I generally avoid anti-natalist threads. But it was a slow day and decided to take a look. I think anti-natalists like to project their own misery onto the rest of us without any sign of self-awareness. I find it hard to take them seriously. — T Clark
To procreate is to impose a whole lifetime in this world on another person without that person's prior consent. Normally it is wrong - seriously wrong - to make a major imposition on another person without their prior consent. We recognize this in other contexts. And it doesn't get much more major than imposing a lifetime here on another person. So that's one reason - a Kantian reason - to think that procreation is default wrong. — Bartricks
↪Antinatalist So you think there is something wrong with letting people commit suicide while they’re young, and at the same time you think that them not being able to do so is unjust? How can you have both? — khaled
↪Antinatalist
Once born, however, a human being is highly unlikely to have the sufficient skills to commit suicide before the age of five – often, in fact, not before turning ten or even fifteen. When this wish arises and the individual aims to fulfill it, surrounding people strive to prevent the suicide almost without exceptions if they only can. Furthermore, a vast number of highly retarded people exist who, due to their condition, will never really be able to commit suicide. One must in any case consider the possibility of having to live a perhaps highly agonizing period of life before suicide, due to a choice – that of creating life – for which the individual him/herself is not responsible
— Antinatalist
Your objection seems to be that not everyone can commit suicide, but everyone can return the gift. I don't find that convincing, but does it mean that if painless assisted suicide was a right, you wouldn't be AN? — khaled
I think I have written this text earlier to this forum (the following text is from my original article, which is a little bit longer than the one I posted here). — Antinatalist
Gift could be harmful, but comparing gift to having a child is, although natural, but also very extreme thing to do.
— Antinatalist
Having a child is not a trivial everyday task.
— Antinatalist
I'm pointing out that just because something is an unconsented imposition clearly doesn't automatically make it wrong. So you need more premises to make the case that this specific unconsented imposition (having kids) is wrong. I am not comparing having kids to giving gifts, I'm pointing out that they share the same properties and you think one is fine while the other isn't. That needs explaining. — khaled
I think the main axiom here is that prevented harms is more important than missed goods (when nobody exists to be deprived). That is the basic axiom which the rest of the asymmetry seems to follow. And it does make sense. No person to miss out on the goods of life is neutral. A person missing out on harms, is good. — schopenhauer1
Even situation like this, I don´t think it´s obligation to reproduce. — Antinatalist
I don't quite follow what you are trying to say here. I think with Benatar's asymmetry you simply have to keep in mind that preventing harm is more important than happiness-bringing. I guess that is the basic asymmetry. — schopenhauer1
↪Antinatalist
Finally, nobody will know is it better for human being born into this world or not. However, we know that if child born into this world, her/his life could be painful, perhaps she/he will suffer really hard.
— Antinatalist
Do you think of this when deciding what gift to buy a friend for an occasion then settling on nothing since the gift could be harmful? — khaled
I find it dubious that any action that can risk harming someone automatically becomes wrong if you don’t have their consent. — khaled
Even situation like this, I don´t think it´s obligation to reproduce. — Antinatalist
You seem to have somewhat of a false dichotomy going on. Either one must have children or one must not have children. — khaled
2) Ethics should be based on deontological grounds more than utilitarian, but this doesn't mean that degrees of harm are not existent. Thus, as an example, a very low level theft is wrong, but not as wrong as a theft of someone's life savings or life saving drugs.
3) Amelioration is inherent in existence. That is to say, we are always compromising minimal harms to alleviate lesser harms. Perhaps the cost of a low level harm of a surprise party (because the person doesn't like being surprised) is what must happen in living in any social milieu. We are always compromising, and imposing on others by necessity. Procreation prevents any need for amelioration. All harms are prevented with no collateral damage.
a) No one is obligated to bring about happy people
b) We are obligated to prevent unnecessary harm if it's possible.
c) Not procreating prevents all unnecessary harm for another person (and conversely doesn't create unnecessary harm on their behalf).
d) Once existing, ameliorations must take place for life to move forward. Thus though things can have a low level harm, they can be necessary to ameliorate greater harms. — schopenhauer1
↪Antinatalist
Hi Antinatalist, as you may already know, I like your arguments.. Things that I have to add here:
Unnecessary, and unwanted harmful impositions are wrong, period, entailed in the fact that it is on someone else's behalf. All life has some minor transactional harms.. Even giving someone a gift can lead to some harm (butterfly affect maybe). — schopenhauer1
However birth is one example where absolutely no harm will follow to any ONE (as they won't exist), and no ONE misses out either (Benatarian asymmetry). — schopenhauer1
Antinatalist I don’t buy any of that. Nor do I find it logically persuasive. Some people REALLY SUFFER therefore having children is bad? That is not even weak, it’s just plain silly.
Note: I’m assuming there is more? If not take the bombast as not bombast :) — I like sushi
These are sufficient arguments not to reproduce, not to create human life in to this world.
— Antinatalist
Sorry, I missed the arguments? What argument? Suffering isn’t necessarily ‘negative’ either. It is ephemeral and allows learning. Learning is ‘suffering’ to some degree. — I like sushi
Next thing that bothered me is comparing apples with oranges. Saying a statue is like a creating a baby? Is a baby a piece of art now. That just doesn’t work. Analogies are not particularly helpful here I feel. — I like sushi
Another point …
A Linkola-spirited argument to this could be: "Only what is can have value. Non-life cannot have value."
A possible response could be: "Maybe so, but similarly only what is can have non-value."
— Antinatalist
That is just plain nonsense.
The glaringly obvious point that needs to be addressed is what ‘good’ means and what ‘wrong’ means. Also, what exactly is ‘suffering’ and given that there is an underlying idea that life is only worth living if it is pleasure for the most part seems a bit strange. — I like sushi
I believe the solution to the is/ought dichotomy is that it is a false dichotomy—‘ought’ entails ‘is’, for what is the case is what ought to be the case given the available evidence and the powers of our understanding. And the truth ultimately aids us in doing the right thing. ‘Is’ is therefore an outgrowth of ‘ought’. — Adam Hilstad
Pro-life people seems not so pro life when we are including their threats and actions against abortion doctors to the whole picture.
— Antinatalist
Social death penalty is not murder — Gregory
According to Moore, we could never reach the state where we just can define something for pure and absolutely good. There´s always question about is that what we defined as good, really good.
— Antinatalist
Yes, that is the Open Question argument. I think it fails because Moore fails to define what we mean by 'good'. He basically just gives up on trying to define it, and assumes that good is indefinable, that it is just a word that refers to something we can't find in nature. This is where I disagree with him, because I think we can define 'good', indeed I think I have defined it, and I expect I shall continue to think that until someone proves me wrong.
The name of this topic is What are we doing? Is/ought divide. Do you consider also, that David Hume was wrong?
— Antinatalist — Herg
Yes. If I'm right about the meaning of 'good' and 'bad', then if an action causes pain, then that action, other things being equal, is a bad action. — Herg
The fact-value bridge has been crossed, and I think we should ask ourselves, in that situation, which is more plausible: that the fact that the action is bad means we ought not to do it, or that the fact that the action is bad has no moral significance at all, and we are morally free to do it if we wish despite its badness. I think the former position is more plausible than the latter, because we are now in value territory, and there's what seems to me a compelling congruence between the good/bad split, the right/wrong split, and the ought/ought not split. This isn't a watertight argument, but it seems to me that once we have crossed the fact-value divide, there's little reason not to go the whole hog and accept that we ought not to do bad things (such as causing pain). — Herg
Anyway, I find utilitarian ethics untenable.
— Antinatalist
Well, again, supporting reasons for this position would be nice. But having been told off by Gregory for being too demanding, I'm not going to push. — Herg
I want to agree with you, but I think you are making a naturalistic fallacy.
— Antinatalist
It would help if you would explain why you think that. I've been careful to defend my view against Moore and Hare, so what now is your objection? Or, if you don't think I've successfully defended myself against them, can you say why? — Herg
I haven't claimed that pleasure is the whole of ethics. I'm simply claiming that it's a fact that pleasure is good. — Herg
Somebody could have pleasure, when she/he is torturing someone else. I don´t regard that kind of a pleasure as good.
So, when valuing pleasure I think is important what kind of circumstances it occurs.
I find it hard to believe that the pleasure of the torturer could be so great that it would outweigh the pain of the tortured, so I think a simple utilitarian-style pleasure/pain calculus can deal quite easily with this objection. — Herg
I think Moore´s point of view is more metaphysical or ontological, we have statements like "pleasure is good" and at the same time we would never know what is "good" for sure.
— Antinatalist
I suppose another way of putting that would be to say that Moore thought we can't know what 'good' refers to - what property it denotes. But it seems to me that we can't decide that issue until we have worked out what the word 'good' actually means, i.e. what function it performs in ordinary discourse. R.M.Hare, whose lectures I attended long ago when life was simpler and we all had more and longer hair (well, I did), reformulated Moore's open question and thought that in so doing he had made it unanswerable (https://www.jstor.org/stable/2252015?seq=1).
However, Hare's argument only succeeds if we agree with Hare on two points: that descriptions can never also be evaluations, and that the sole function of the word 'good' is to commend. The first of these is what we are trying to establish, so Hare's argument begs the question; and I think 'good' does more than just commend. When we say 'that was a good dinner', I think we are not just commending the dinner, we are also saying something about it, i.e. we are attributing to it some property. It would be closer to the truth if we said that we are claiming that the dinner was commendable, i.e. deserved to be commended (and of course we would then be commending the dinner by implication). However, I would want to cast the linguistic net somewhat wider, and point out (a) that commending is an activity which displays a positive attitude to something, and (b) that there are several other activities which display positive attitudes, such as approving, desiring, seeking out, etc.. It seems to me that 'good' gestures to all of these kinds of activities without specifically selecting any one of them; so I would claim that when we say 'that was a good dinner', what we actually mean is 'that dinner was such as to merit a positive attitude or activity', where the set of available positive attitudes and activities includes approval, commendation, desire, seeking out, etc..
Having established that, the next question is: is there something in nature that intrinsically has this property? I think pleasure does. By 'pleasure' I mean, strictly speaking, pleasantness. Many things can have the property of pleasantness, but it is the property of pleasantness that I think has the property of meriting a positive attitude, rather than the thing that is pleasant. So, for example, I find Beethoven's 6th Symphony pleasant, but it is the pleasantness of my experience in listening to it that has the property of meriting a positive attitude, not the symphony itself. Making someone who doesn't like Beethoven listen to the 6th Symphony would not result, for them, in an experience that merited commendation or desire or seeking out; but if I could give them my experience of listening to the 6th Symphony, then their experience, like mine, would merit those attitudes and activities.
So I think Moore had it all wrong. My metaphysical and ontological thesis about 'good' would be that pleasantness is good, and unpleasantness is bad, and therefore we do not have to look to non-natural properties (whatever they may be) to find what 'good refers to or denotes'; what it denotes is the meriting of positive attitudes and activities that is a property of the pleasantness of our own, entirely natural, experiences. — Herg
Moore had said if good is defined as pleasure, or any other natural property, "good" may be substituted for "pleasure", or that other property, anywhere where it occurs. However, "pleasure is good" is a meaningful, informative statement;
— Antinatalist
— Herg
I don't think 'pleasure is good' is informative to any being that has experienced pleasure. — Herg
The only way one could imagine "too much" pain (suffering) is as it would prevent pleasure entirely... but, as pain and pleasure can only exist in conjunction with each other, pain (stress) can never so far outweigh pleasure (relief) as to render it impossible for the thing that experiences them.
— Marigold23
I totally disagree.
— Antinatalist
I'd like to rephrase what I said here
Anyone may say some amount of pain is "Too much pain" if by that they mean it has passed a boundary of pain which they would be comfortable with... In fact, no pain is generally comfortable so a person may say all pain is, by subjective definition, "too much pain", if they're just referring to their feelings regarding it.
Therefore, I assume by "too much pain" we must be referring to a point at which pain or discontent for an organism passes an objective limit where it fundamentally destroys the functional capacity of the organism to experience it... Death, in other words... if an organism is not destroyed by pain or discontent, then it is not "too much pain".(except by a subjective evaluation).
Pain after all is meant to be functional, and one may see how it can fail in this function and be described as "too much" or even "too little"...same with pleasure, if we are referring to some function which they carry out. That function seems most likely to be life preservation and reproduction of the organism, like most biological functions.
And of course, If pain results in death directly, then it may prevent pleasure from being experienced as well as pain... but, as an organism survives, it must be able to experience both pain and relief from pain... they go together in living things... — Marigold23
I actually agreed with antinatalism for some time, so I feel a bit like I'm talking with my past self. I find antinatalism to be an intelligent conclusion in a lot of respects... I like its devotion to the adamant regret of all pain and discontent in itself.
People want pain to be relieved and pleasure to increase... but I believe they cannot want "not to be" or for pain and pleasure to be eliminated. To say "I would prefer never to have been" is the same as saying "I would prefer not to be." To believe that it would be better "never to have been" is a prerequisite to antinatalism. There is a fallacy in that statement: For one, as I said, a person can only truly desire what s/he can conceive (what has been experienced)...while a person may imagine death (as an idea of non being and non feeling like unconscious sleep), and act upon that imagining, say, to commit suicide, they cannot truly conceive of non existence, and so we must conclude they acted not with any negative association to their actual existence, but to some object or stimulation in their existence...to this extent, I must conclude that all suicide is, to some extent, unintended or accidental with regard to the relationship between the intention of the suicidal in reducing pain/discontent and the actual outcome of suicide which is pain and pleasure both being eliminated (rather than reduced) in the death of that person's ability to associate (or to think and feel)... A person cannot truly desire a state which is beyond conception. This is not to say that a suicidal person cannot understand the truth of this... in the same way that an alcoholic doesn't act logically due to the stress upon the mind in a chemical imbalance from addiction, there are all sorts of mental stimulation which hinder logical action... extreme pain and discontent are among them. There is no requirement that people must act logically, but there is a requirement that we cannot act based on inconceivable concepts... and an illogical act (like suicide) could however be a reasonable or understandable act if the discontent is more than a person can bear... but they cannot possibly associate negatively to their existence itself...we do not experience existence itself...we experience noticeable or "experience-able" things... a thing (or state) couldn't possibly experience itself because experience requires detachment from stimuli prior to any noticeable contact with it. We cannot, as we exist, be detached from existence in itself in order to experience it, and so positive or negative association with it is absurd, just as it is absurd to associate positively or negatively with non existence... — Marigold23
For another thing, a desire is expressive of a current state and past states leading up to it... to regret being itself would necessitate regret of that regret... (an association to your association). In other words, if you could truly conceive of your existence or non existence in the first place, (which you can't) and you were to associate negatively to your existence, you would also be associating negatively with that negative association. This is an absurdity, because we don't regret the fact of our regret...
try it... do you regret your regret?... if that were so, then wouldn’t you stop regretting?
And if you don’t regret your regret, then you can’t possibly regret your existence which is a prerequisite to your decision to regret. — Marigold23
As far as the responsibility of parents for their children, I would also generally agree with you that parents are (most of time) intentionally, causally responsible, in tandem to nature itself.
Any moral responsibility though is not universal but relative and subjective, though I would also agree subjectively that there is a moral responsibility of the parents in caring for their children. — Marigold23