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  • #MeToo

    That there was abuse because of the relationship is not that the relationship was abusive.

    A bad divorce wouldn’t mean a bad marriage.
  • #MeToo

    It's presumptuous to assume that a relationship is abusing or harassment just because one person has more power than another.Michael

    Any ‘abuse’ came in the aftermath, when I was made a scapegoat in order to protect his powerful position. — Monica

    But the aftermath is part of the relationship, so in this case it is not presumptuous. But one ought to be presumptuous in any case. One ought to presume that power imbalances will lead to manufactured consent, as is the case in prostitution. That is why many professional bodies prohibit such relationships absolutely, such as doctors with patients, teachers with children. which is to say that if Monica and Bill want to have a consensual sexual relationship, they can do so in my book as soon as they are no longer in a professional power relationship. It is a matter of protecting the vulnerable in general from exploitation and abuse, even if some of them quite like being abused in particular situations.

    We might even find it plausible that Harvey Weinstein's 'weakness' was on occasion exploited by ambitious women, or that Monica herself exploited Bill's inability to pass up a chance to play the lover-boy to further her career; one never knows. But however it works, and whoever is being exploited, there are other parties to consider: the PAs or actresses who do not compromise their virtue, and the audiences and electors who are potentially deprived of the best person to be doing the job.
  • #MeToo

    I'm not making light of sexual harassment. Nobody should be pressured to fuck the boss or supervisor or co-worker--except where the rewards are going to be very attractive.Bitter Crank

    I am glad you are not making light of sexual harassment as it is not a light topic but one that is being brought out into the light of day.
    Correct me if I am wrong but what I am reading is that you might believe that if the rewards are good enough, a boss or supervisor should be able to come onto an employee?

    . But workers are at the mercy of their employers (thanks to corporate interests killing off unions). Workers have no job security (employment at will means you can be fired for any reason), no freedom of speech while on the job, and no real protection from unreasonable demands -- of any kind.Bitter Crank

    To start with I should let you know that AZ is a right to work state which also means the right to fire without reason given state. I believe Unions represent 4% of workers in AZ which seems very low in comparison to say, Minnesota or Illinois.

    Having said that the idea that "workers are at the mercy of their employers" is true to a degree and that is what is shifting. Being groped by the manager on the job, as a matter of your shift interaction, is now something that can be confronted and that is what really needs to happen, on the spot confrontation.
    Women and men who thought they had to 'put up' with this kind of lewd behavior because no one would believe them, are now understanding that there are many more in the shadows, that have tolerated such behavior in silence then they ever knew.

    It is much more difficult to prove in a "he said, she said" report of harassment/and or molestation than it is to call the bastard/bitch out RIGHT when it happens. So maybe this movement will empower those being harassed/and or molested to call the aggressor out and not wait for someone in HR to make that decision for them. That is a possibility. Another possibility is for society to update their attitude that the days of the'good ole boys club' has come to an end. The days of offering up the justification that in submitting to the bosses advances will get you ahead in your workplace is no longer available. Men who believe that they can wield their power of making you a star employee from the end of their penis should understand that "unreasonable demands -- of any kind" are no longer acceptable but what is acceptable is them being called out for it.

    Harvey Weinstein may be a creep, but Hollywood has been run by energetic, creative, ingenious egotistical, manipulative, jerks since the place started making movies. Why are we so surprised when one of these guys is called out for being a jerk??Bitter Crank

    With all the allegations against Harvey, undercover FBI recordings, his wife leaving him and his expulsion from the only professional community he has ever known, I feel safe in saying that Harvey was more than a "jerk" but he is a sexual predator. He used his power and status to advance his own sexual demands, in a behavior pattern that lasted decades. What is surprising even to Harvey is that people are speaking up about him like never before. Even he is stunned and is saying "People make mistakes" and "deserve a second chance" well my friend, not one of these reports sound like a "mistake" but rather massive manipulation. And as far as deserving a "second chance"? A chance to do what and to whom?
  • #MeToo

    Thankfully, it was not rape but it was sexual harassment and/ or abuse in the work place, which Monica should not have to have endured. I wonder what would have happened if she would have filed a complaint of sexual harassment and/ or abuse by a sitting President.ArguingWAristotleTiff

    Monica Lewinsky Writes About Her Affair With President Clinton:

    Maintaining that her affair with Clinton was one between two consenting adults, Lewinsky writes that it was the public humiliation she suffered in the wake of the scandal that permanently altered the direction of her life: “Sure, my boss took advantage of me, but I will always remain firm on this point: it was a consensual relationship. Any ‘abuse’ came in the aftermath, when I was made a scapegoat in order to protect his powerful position. . . . The Clinton administration, the special prosecutor’s minions, the political operatives on both sides of the aisle, and the media were able to brand me. And that brand stuck, in part because it was imbued with power.”

    It's presumptuous to assume that a relationship is abusive or harassment just because one person has more power than another.
  • #MeToo

    Both are relevant and what did Monica to Bill is a perfect example of a person of power using that for/or against a man she has a sexual interest in.Sir2u

    So what you are saying is that Monica (22yrs old) and Slick Willey (49yrs old) were both of adult consensual age and both were of equal power between one another, using each persons political power to their own advantage? Monica's to advance her career and Willey to continue on his pattern of taking advantage of women who fall at his feet, without getting caught?
  • #MeToo

    All workers can expect to be harassed on the job, sooner or later, whatever form the harassment takes. The reason for this is that most jobs are exploitation to start with. Sexual harassment is but a specialty.

    I'm not making light of sexual harassment. Nobody should be pressured to fuck the boss or supervisor or co-worker--except where the rewards are going to be very attractive. On the other hand, pursuing relationships on the job seems like a normal activity to me -- and just as raping one's date is a bad way to start a great relationship, mauling one's co-workers isn't an auspicious beginning either.

    I suspect that Monica Lewinsky thought the rewards were going to be pretty attractive. I don't know what Bill got out of it -- blow job? Hand job?

    But back to my first point -- workers get jerked around on the job rather often. Sure, there are some jobs, some work sites, where there is more bullying, or less arbitrary and capricious docking of wages, and there are even a few places that workers land in that are quite pleasant, at least for a while. But workers are at the mercy of their employers (thanks to corporate interests killing off unions). Workers have no job security (employment at will means you can be fired for any reason), no freedom of speech while on the job, and no real protection from unreasonable demands -- of any kind.

    Harvey Weinstein may be a creep, but Hollywood has been run by energetic, creative, ingenious egotistical, manipulative, jerks since the place started making movies. Why are we so surprised when one of these guys is called out for being a jerk??
  • #MeToo

    Both are relevant and what Bill did to Monica is a perfect example of a person of power using that for/or against a woman he has a sexual interest in.ArguingWAristotleTiff

    Both are relevant and what did Monica to Bill is a perfect example of a person of power using that for/or against a man she has a sexual interest in.

    They were both to blame. Buttheads
  • #MeToo

    Why does Bill Clinton not get held accountable by feminists? I have never understood this.fishfry

    What makes you think that Slick Willey gets a pass for what he did in the Oval Office?
    Or are you saying that Bills' interaction with Monica Lewinsky made her a #MeToo ?
    Both are relevant and what Bill did to Monica is a perfect example of a person of power using that for/or against a woman he has a sexual interest in. Thankfully, it was not rape but it was sexual harassment and/ or abuse in the work place, which Monica should not have to have endured. I wonder what would have happened if she would have filed a complaint of sexual harassment and/ or abuse by a sitting President.
  • #MeToo

    Why does Bill Clinton not get held accountable by feminists? I have never understood this.
  • #MeToo

    The now infamous man Harry Weinstein, spurred a discussion on those who have experienced some type of sexual harassment or assault in the workplace. As more famous women came out to speak about their encounters with Harry Weinstein, Alyssa Milano urged any women who have been sexually harassed or assaulted to write two words on Twitter: “Me too.”
    It didn't take long for some men to speak up and say: "Me too." Which is a good thing, as society has finally come to accept, that men can be abused, harassed and assaulted just as easily as a woman, especially when encountered in the workplace. Women sympathize with men just like we do our fellow woman and believe that there should be no guilt associated with it, no shame, no second guessing who was harassing whom and that it ends now.
    But does it?
    Sharing the hashtag "Me Too" is a fantastic start but the other question to ask is: If it has happened to you and you didn't report it, will you confront that person now?
    Sharing that you were sexually harassed or assaulted in the workplace is part of the solution but the other half is to try to make sure that no one else is put into that situation again, with this same harasser.
    Thoughts?

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