I should also clarify, that life is not suffering inescapably, or it isn't a bitter pill that you must swallow. No, you have the choice, but you chose correctly because you're strong, and noble, and not weak and cowardly.

Pick up your cross? Life is suffering? Nobility, virtue, love; they are good. Not pleasure, not positivity, not happiness.

Everyone's coping, I know that I for one am no Jesus, I'm so full of sin that it may be irreparable, but you have to understand that things are much bigger than you or me. There is a war being waged.

Not the dragon. I'd be a lot better at keeping behind the scenes if I were, what else would I need the other two beasts for?

I hold faith and religion in high regard, and using them like a tu qouque -- because they won't like that(!) -- I dislike, as quite the contrary, it is presumed to lower them to our level, and equal things, they won't like that! But it would actually raise them up and elevate them, but neither is the case. It is a blatant attempt to reduce their currency, and that is all. They are faithless, cold, unwilling to really believe anything too much, to be always doubtful, confused, uncertain, and knowers of nothing... that people can actually sell you those ideas, and not make them sound preposterous... but I bought them too... look how being worse actually makes me better!

I think that a slippery slope argument is possible. You imagine having an incredible power in your back pocket, but just using it completely justly and legitimately that one time, and then never again? It wouldn't be the case that using it would be easier each time, requiring less legitimacy, until you'd be exercising it because you can, it's easy, and you have nothing better to do.

We're thrown into a game, a life, that we don't even know the rules or limits of. I didn't find it that compelling, in that Light held all of the cards, and knew exactly what was happening, how it all worked, and what the rules were, and he still almost lost to someone that had to figure all those incredibly unlikely details out, through inference, and tricking Light into revealing as much as he could. L was so expletive smart, that his intuition told him that Light was the one from the moment he saw him, he just could never prove it to himself explicitly.

Need a safe space.

Since this is haunting me... thank you so much Loosefanbeltdan... thanks... I have to explain why I'm not the devil, and what relationships with the same elements will mark them, I do know what the mark is, where it indeed is ambiguous on me, but that is because I have severe damage, but I'm repairing it, it will get repaired.

The devil is like the predator aspect, and the soul the prey. You can tell it because it feels really good to be on top, and not so much to be on the bottom. All submissive elements are in the prey, including gratitude, appreciation, love, sadness, remorse. So that, if one is to appreciate the sacrifices of the saints and true followers, they are to appreciate, with grief, mourning, gratitude, awe. One does not throw bodies at a problem and then be pleased. One does not corrupt the covenant with frivolity, with greed, elation, drunkenness, excitement.

And I wouldn't know all of these things right now to be paranoid about if it wasn't for you, I'd still be allowed to curse and profane, which is totally like my favorite thing, besides making light and laughing at everything. With barely containable glee, and pleasure at my own appreciations of something others died for, and I praise myself for seeing. Like praising your eyeballs for being able to see the artist's painting.

But they take 1 minute to make...

Now I need pizza pockets... see what you did.

Everyone knows I'm not the devil right? That's ridiculous, and silly, the devil isn't real... only God is... not the devil, so don't think about that part. And that is totally not what the devil would say.

It's a reference to the three beasts of revelation.

The really scary part is that you have to be sane enough to know something is wrong with you, to know that you're crazy. Those seeking help are far saner than those offering it almost always. Believe me, I can tell by looking.

I had a therapist red face yelling at me over the summer, and display an almost disgust at my level of vulnerability. People don't pity me when I walk in the room either, particularly not mediocre frumpy men. He's lucky he was through a tv sceen. I just had a big manic break down, and needed a doctors note for work for a little time off. He wanted to medicate me, even though I was not at that time manic, and I pretty much told him that I didn't think that he knew how to help me, but I needed the diagnosis, so he told me that if I didn't agree to do what he told me, then I didn't have bi-polar, or a medical issue, even though he just got down telling me that I did. So I told him that he was being unfair and unreasonable, as not agreeing to his treatment doesn't mean I no longer have it, obviously. Then he got all super pissed off, so I told him he was an arrogant prick and left basically.

Our grace came from the sea, our strength came from the land, our soul from the stars. — loosefanbeltdan

That's pretty damn ominous...

I take ruled by logic to mean simply can just think, make proper logical connections, and what not. As in, they don't operate without critical analysis. As opposed to just operating on whimsy, or believing and thinking things due to preferences, fears, or desires, rather than properly rational connections.

Taken like that it is pretty difficult to dispute, it's basically just saying a sane vs an insane person.

Everyone talks about being dispassionate, that is pretty huge, but I think that because the passions elevate the heart, boil the blood, and constantly being in an elevated state will definitely strip the years off of your life span, and being calm and collected is superior to that, but what is superior still is the widest possible range. My resting heart rate is in the 50s, and I can maintain pretty good marathon paces for hours, I think that allowing for high levels of passion also makes higher levels of dispassion possible.

I'd rather say jealousy is appropriate, as I have no right to it that you lack. You need to follow your heart to shattering, to contrition. You don't know how to do that off the cuff, nor do I, but some stuff matters to you, and you'll feel the pains, you'll feel the tears when you start hitting the right notes, and it is the way your emotions will react to your interrogation of yourself. You don't yet know what you think and feel or are really like, so you have to start asking yourself, and when you begin to feel the remorse for the ways you are, grab that line for dear life, and hold the hell on. Yeah, no one likes going through that, but you need to be shattered to be primed for change.

Yeah, feeling ways is hard. Everyone hates messy, unpredictable, burning passion. Everyone wants cold, still calmness. The even harder sell is that one hemisphere of the brain is responsible for positive effect states, and the other negative, and one cannot prefer positive emotions over negative ones without causing imbalances.

Also logic doesn't dictate how anything ought to be, or what any actions ought to be taken at all. That always begins in passion, but the heart isn't an appetite, it can be satiated, and it is always other directed. It loves everyone except you -- and it being everyone else and not you, you love it, and not yourself, also. Agape in a convoluted nutshell.

What it means when one believes themselves to be operating completely on logic, is that the passions that are truly calling the shuts just go subterranean.

I dunno, you're right, may not be helpful, and I don't have like ideas to offer, more than allusions, and practices. See, we understand others by mirroring them with the motor cortex, and that doesn't work so well when you aren't open and flexible (and the darkness is frightening). The ideas, or characteristic narrative that you inherit will just play in the mind in the back ground as a consequence of attaining the human form.

When people hurt you, you of course close off to people... I dunno man, I just got saved... by the most ridiculously convenient coincidence ever. To somehow distrust and hate everyone enough to be within a millimeter away from absolute certainty of their nonsense wrongness, and then I submitted to the essence of what all of the representations point to, without realizing that for the majority of the time that I was doing it.

"I don't build up illusions till I make myself sick" -- Bob Dylan

Get out of yer head. The secret, and truth is of course, is that due to all of the day dreaming, body is all bound together and twisted, and if only you could stay present long enough, you might start to notice all of the arches and pains you ignore and shut out, like you do with all pain.

You strike me as being capable of a lot, I hope that you don't ruin it with drugs. The best stuff is subtle, and difficult to perceive, but there for everyone. It isn't grand extremely stimulating experiences.

Because this has nothing to do with tastes and appetites. Whether something is palatable or not... that has nothing at all to do with whether something is the case. All of your objections are of this "boo" nature, rather than anything substantive.

Right? And unlike grown ups, they never fail to notice the smallest lapses in attention. Spaces within which to move freely. Or even more horrifying, mirroring the strained haggard expressions of the haunted, so that they may be infected too. The cost of loving you.

"And in your waiting hands I will land, and roll out of my skin." The level of that observation is extremely impressive.

I want to be enlightened like the Buddha, but I got these efffing kids...

Simple, attain to nine independent domain specific masteries, awaken all of your faculties, and obtain all nine muses. Get on it.

That's just a gay erection... opposite.

It's wrong because it's murder. You don't have that right. It is conceivably worse than murder in long term contribution to death toll through influence. There are three times the suicides as there are murders, implying that it is more contagious.

You are punishing yourself due to some unfulfilled desire, goal, or dream, and it is the losing and clinging to hope of this subpersonality which is punishing the shit out of you, and threatening your murder for your failure to fulfill it. It's what needs offing. It's what needs severing, abandoning, killing. Let it die. Don't let it do that to you.

Pray for help.

It's just a jump to the left...