We seem to agree technically. But I think you might have missed the case I was making in the quotes section. (Re-reading it, it was probably my lack of clarity) — Jack2848
Not a worry! I will try to understand better.
Suppose that one day we find some configuration of a human brain (cocktail of chemicals and electrical signal tendencies or whatever) that correlate strongly with women. And a different configuration in the brain with men. And that some are born with a brain that usually correlates with women but is in a male body. As a result they would detect this. — Jack2848
Ah. Interestingly enough, it may not be a hypothetical. The brain science is still out on a final conclusion of this of course, but it seems that homosexual men have brain structures that resemble both male and female brain structures.
If that were so, then our current non empathy while missing that knowledge would be horrible to say the least. — Jack2848
There's an old saying. "The road to hell is paved with good intentions." While I definitely understand your view, what the science above shows is that having feminine parts of your brain doesn't actually make you a woman. In our attempt to be sympathetic to an unproven claim, we accidently gloss over a proven claim and unintentionally label homosexual men as "Women in male bodies who should transition."
Empathy without responsibility and rationality can result in mistakes as well. Ever been asked by a homeless man for money on the street while he holds a gas can in in his hand? Empathy would inspire you to give it to him. Responsibility would do one better and offer to bring the gas to him. Rationality is realizing he was scamming you as he gets angry and waves you off to go look for another victim.
We should not have empathy for irresponsible and unproven claims. There is no regret if later we do find that the claim was both responsible and proven. There is no shame or wrong in denying that empathy until the full story is known.
Probably we want to not become delusional but we also want to be supportive. If a demented person truly believes they are in the 70's. And they won't reject that claim. That let them live in the 70's. While we obviously will recognize our modern day status. — Jack2848
Exactly. I think you and I are on once again, technically in agreement. The point in your examples is we know all of the information. One person is ugly, one person is not. We assume that both of them have socially positive demeaners. Should we let our instinct to gravitate to be nicer to Brad Pitt and meaner to Crad Shit lead our actions? Probably not.
But I get that ideally we would toughen up if we are the ones on the receiving end of difficult remarks. Because we have to survive. But I -wouldn't- say that you -can't- expect people to manage their emotions such that they could have this conversation in front of you without treating you like a monster. — Jack2848
I've thought about it for a good long while, and this is what I've come up with. Feel free to disagree, its always good to get another viewpoint. I believe we cannot expect people to hold our own viewpoints. That people's life experience, thoughts, and education are too varied to expect complex and rationally complete behavior. It is not that people are unthinking, unfeeling, or mean by nature. It is that people are often spending most of their energy taking care of their own immediate needs and wants. Healthy and well off people generally have time and resources to spend considering things outside of their immediate survival. But even then, the amount of time they spend is charity from their part, not obligation. Many spend that 'extra time' to further better themselves through riches, entertainment, or other things they desire to pursue in life.
Which means we are often left with basic culture. A common low denominator viewpoint that allows us to have a template for easy, polite, and productive interactions in public. These are things like, "Accept a person's individual expression. Don't insult people in public just because you don't like them. Don't go out of your way to shame or harm."
When people start demanding things of culture that are more complex, problems start to happen. Generally we are taught not to stare or point out things that stick out in society with people who have deficiencies or mental problems. But imagine if we started to say, "When you meet a person with a missing leg, you must call them 'long legs'" The problem here is we've gone beyond, "Be polite by not bringing up a person's deficiency," to 'Bring it up and pretend they don't have it!'" This runs counter to normal polite interactions and also now places a burden upon someone who interacts with someone who has a deficiency. Instead of, "Be passively polite" which takes little effort, its now an extra social rule combined with a phrase you need to know. In addition, you must not pretend that what is real is not. Its an unconscionable demand in to put on individuals in a free culture.
You're demanding of the person in public that they give time, energy and effort to learning a special interaction, and putting them in a state of distress where they must acknowledge something they shouldn't have to. It would be the same as if culture required that in an interaction with me, I must be referred to as handsome at least once. That would be demeaning from my point of view to be coddled as if I have the mind of a child, and again, uncomfortable to demand from other people.
Narcissistic or mentally delusional behavior entitles burden on other people when you interact with them culturally. It is an innately selfish or ignorant view that you think you as an individual should be elevated to any special ritualistic or linguistic importance in society. What should be owed is polite acceptance where one's deficiency is not overtly pointed out or lied about. The idea that a person should see a man or a woman and be told that they should be polite by using pronouns that reference the other sex is out of line. It is a violation of normal polite cultural interaction. It should be insulting to the individual being lied to. Which indicates again, either narcissism, ignorance, or mental delusion.
It is not that I don't have empathy for transitioned individuals. It is that I also hold that they have the same responsibilities in culture as everyone else. Be polite, don't demand special interactions of others, and you can expect that most people will gloss over your deficiencis and difference. I feel it is perfectly fine to call out that a transitioned individual is not special in anyway, a human like everyone else, and should not expect anything more in society besides polite acceptance.
I think this is innately understood at some level, which is why gender was invented and used as it is. In matters of sex, its quite obvious. When you throw a confusing idea like like gender in the mix, and try to elevate it over sex, its an attempt to get society to treat you in a way that you personally desire, not accepting that the norms of society are not obligated to give you that. Again, this is either narcissism or mental delusion. And I do not think it is kind, responsible, or rational to support or allow that kind of behavior in society and culture.
To my observations, the gender experiment has largely failed. People are angry. They know the norms of society have been overriden, and feel its a burden that they're not allowed to talk about. They can't quite put their finger on it, but slowly it is expanding over the culture as more incidents of transitioned people expecting language and culture to break its norms for them continue to occur. As such trans people are not being observed as integrated into the culture, but demanding individuals that want to stand out and fight the culture. That usually ends in faliture.
The trans community in my mind should cease any demands of society immediately. Let people call your sex as they observe you. Do not demand cross sex access. Dress as you like, transition, etc. but don't require special interactions. Just 'be chill'. Go about your day, live your life, and if people are rude to you simply because you are different, the culture will protect you like it would any one else who is outside of the norm. Because you aren't really different. Still human, still a person just trying to do things in public, a nobody that no one should make a big deal over.