A Dialogue about Sweaty Socks, a Huge Bag and Everything

Two old friends, Mark Mywords and Ann Ansur, meet in a bar in downtown Athens. In the tradition of Plato’s Socratic dialogues, they discuss an age-old question.

MARK:
The ouzo in this place tastes a little like sweaty old socks, although the effect on my frontal lobes will doubtlessly do the trick!

ANN:
Your palate is quite adventurous, my friend. I’ve never tasted sweaty old socks myself.

MARK:
In my defense, disgusting socks are a delicacy that only a scant few of us can truly appreciate.

ANN:
Well, hopefully the alcohol won’t dull your senses too much because I was hoping to discuss something that’s been on my mind lately.

MARK:
No worries. I’m thinking as clearly as the proverbial babbling brook. So what’s crept into that bat-infested mind of yours?

ANN:
I was thinking about the universe and everything in it.

MARK:
Everything?

ANN:
Yes. You, me and every other person on Earth. Mount Olympus, Crete, Antarctica, Asia, the moon, the Milky Way and all the other galaxies. The Earth and all other planets everywhere….

MARK:
How about ouzo and sweaty old socks?!

ANN:
Them too! And beer and sockless sandals as well. Even a bank’s interest rates, along with poems, love, hate, wars, bacteria, music, fiction, black holes, electrons, any and all sentient and intelligent beings throughout the universe. Everything.

MARK:
Now you’ve got my attention. Why in the world – no pun intended – were you thinking of everything? Isn’t one thing enough to ponder?

ANN:
One thing is enough, for sure, but for now, “everything” is on the table, which is part of everything, too, by the way.

MARK:
Ha! I get it. The table, the dirt on the floor, that bottle cap over there…. There is nothing that is not part of “everything.” So we’ve established our destination. Take me on the journey!

ANN:
Quite simply, the question is: Why is there everything rather than nothing? It’s been asked and discussed by many individuals throughout the ages – including ancient philosophers such as Aristotle and modern physicists like Stephen Hawking.

MARK:
Indeed.

ANN:
It’s the mystery of existence – of life itself even – that is at the root of this question. Why and how has all this, including us, come to be?

MARK:
It’s a head-scratcher, that’s for sure. Let me briefly throw out a common answer we sometimes hear from people. It’s quick, it’s easy, and if it works, then we can discuss something else, like: What is the sound of one hand clapping?

ANN:
Sounds good to me. In fact, you may not be hearing it, but I’m applauding your suggestion with one hand!

MARK:
And your clapping is music to my ears. My simple answer to your vexing question is some version of: God created everything. It was God’s plan for the universe to exist and for us to live in it, and we must have faith in God and God’s reasons for creating everything.

ANN:
Hmmm…

MARK:
Of course, there are many variations to this quick ‘n easy answer, and we can find the details by looking into specific religions, as well as by exploring the many theological explanations and arguments that are available.

ANN:
As you can see, I’m nodding and shaking my head at the same time. At first blush, your answer sounds good. But the difficulty I see with that explanation is that God – and God’s reasons and plans – are all part of the “everything” that I’m asking about. Remember, the question before us is: “Why is there everything?,” which by definition includes God.

MARK:
Good point. And when I think about it, I’m definitely curious about why God and God’s plans and reasons exist – if, of course, such a supreme being actually does exist.

ANN:
Yes. And to be clear: “everything” includes all gods from all religions – both well established ones and those that are obscure.

MARK:
Allah? Brahman? Yaweh? Olorun? Amaterasu?

ANN:
Absolutely. Any and all gods, along with the arguments for and against their existence.

MARK:
And let’s not forget God’s plan, and God’s purpose. Also, the Bible, Koran, Vedic Scriptures, Pāli Canon, Tao Te Ching…. As you said: everything.

ANN:
You’ve hit the proverbial nail on the head, my friend. We’re not asking about everything else and then stopping short of God. We’re more courageous than that!

MARK:
Even though I tend to get my courage from this bottle, you’re right. We’re also wondering about God in our quest. Because if “God” is the answer to why everything else exists, then “Why does God exist?” is the next logical question.

ANN:
Exactly. So why is there everything rather than nothing?

MARK:
Hmmm… That’s a tough one, for sure. Huge, in fact!

ANN: Maybe if we start small, and work our way up?

MARK:
“Small” sounds like a plan. Every journey, after all, begins with one small step!

ANN:
Ok. How about this? A man… let’s call him Ben Thyre.

MARK:
Ben Thyre, Dunn That!

ANN:
Your well of puns runs deep, my good man. At least I know you’re paying attention!

MARK:
You have to get up pretty early in the morning…

ANN:
… to catch both the worm and your nimble mind. I know.

MARK:
But back to Ben….

ANN:
Yes. Ben is inside his house and hears a metallic sound, “tap tap tap.” It appears to be coming from outside and he wonders, “Why am I hearing that sound? What is it?”

MARK:
At this point, it could be anything, right?

ANN:
Absolutely, with but one major and obvious requirement.

MARK:
What’s that?

ANN:
Whatever is causing the “tap tap tap” sound must be part of the universe. Right?

MARK:
Of course.

ANN:
Well, Ben then…

MARK:
Wait!

ANN:
Yes?

MARK:
What if the sound is just an hallucination coming from inside Ben’s head? Then it’s not part of reality, right?

ANN:
Well, while it’s true that hallucinations do not occur “out in the world,” like rain storms, they are neurological events – “brain storms,” as it were – and they do exist. After all, Ben’s head and brain are part of reality, and any brain activity – including hallucinations – would certainly be part of the universe, right?

MARK:
True. Except in this case, you’ve made up Ben. He’s not real… he’s fictitious.

ANN:
But you would agree that I’m not fictitious, right?

MARK:
Absolutely.

ANN:
Therefore, my brain is real, too – something that exists in the universe. And my brain has many physiological processes, one of which is the ability to think up characters such as Ben Thyre.

MARK:
I get it. So Ben – along with all the fictitious characters in novels and theatrical plays the world over – actually exists.

ANN:
Of course, he exists as fiction, but he exists nonetheless. He may not be part of “reality” as we usually understand that term, but he’s certainly part of the universe because I’ve put him out there.

MARK:
Gotcha! It makes sense. If the universe is a huge bag that contains everything there is and I reach into it, I could pull out “Tom Sawyer” because he exists in Mark Twain’s novel of the same name.

ANN:
Precisely.

MARK:
And Edgar Allan Poe’s hallucination about someone he called “Reynolds” days before he died…. I could reach into this bag of everything and pull out the report from Poe’s doctor describing this hallucination, which was part of Poe’s neurological condition at the time. It all exists. It’s all part of the universe.

ANN:
True, that.

MARK:
And even so, whatever you’re about to say could easily be said by a non-hallucinating, non-fictitious person, so we might as well let it be “Ben.”

ANN:
Is that the ouzo talking, my friend, or you? Because either way, you’re exactly right.

MARK:
Ha! It’s me, but before the ouzo does start to open up its ignorant mouth, let’s get back to Ben and his “tap tap tap!”

ANN:
I like your “huge bag” metaphor, by the way.

MARK:
Thanks.

ANN:
Ok. So Ben hears the noise and goes through a few possible explanations in his mind: It could be a small bird pecking at some seeds that may have blown into the gutter on his roof… or maybe it’s a chain in the wind, clanging against the metal fence post next to his garage… or it could even be his wife, an artist, hammering on a piece of sculpture inside her studio.

MARK:
All seem to be reasonable explanations.

ANN:
True. But now Ben’s curiosity gets the best of him and he decides to actually find out, for certain, what’s causing the “tap tap tap.”

MARK:
My money’s on the wife!

ANN:
You always have a soft spot in your heart for the artist, don’t you?

MARK:
Yep… artists and farm animals. Take Vincent van Goat, for example….

ANN:
Oh no… my head laughs but my heart cries!

MARK:
Sorry, but when the ouzo goes in, the puns come out. Please continue.

ANN:
So to discover the actual reason for the sound, Ben walks outside and looks through the open door of his wife’s studio, and he sees that she is not inside.

MARK:
Damn. It wasn’t the artist after all.

ANN:
No, it wasn’t. So he looks over at the fence next to his garage and sees the metal chain is securely fastened and not blowing in the wind.

MARK:
I know where this is heading… chirp, chirp, tweet tweet!

ANN:
Right you are! Because after ruling out the other two explanations, Ben still hears the “tap tap tap,” so he looks up to the roof, where he sees a finch hopping up and down, eating seeds that have fallen inside the gutter. He claps his hands and shouts, which scares the finch away, thereby ending the “tap tap tap” sound and answering his question about what had caused it.

MARK:
Hmmm. It was the bird. And you know what they say, “A bird in the gutter is worth two on a fence post or three in an artist’s studio.”

ANN:
My eyes are not rolling… they’re roiling!

MARK:
In any event, the mystery has been solved and the question has been answered. Ben’s “tap tap tap” sound was caused by a bird in his gutter.

ANN:
Exactly. So let’s take a look at Ben’s process to see what he did to answer his question.

MARK:
My ouzo and I are anxiously awaiting.

ANN:
Something happened to Ben – specifically, he heard a “tap tap tap” sound. Of course, to use your rather instructive metaphor, such sounds are included in the vast “bag” of everything that makes up the universe.

MARK:
Glad to be of assistance, m’lady! And I agree… anything that happens is part of the universe, including sounds – whether they be a finch pecking at seeds in a gutter or a symphonic crescendo coming from inside the New York Philharmonic.

ANN:
Exactly. So Ben reaches into this bag of everything, selects and pulls out the “tap tap tap” sound, and forms the question: “Why am I hearing that sound?” Note that with the exception of the sound, which he has “pulled out,” everything else in the universe remains in the bag at this point.

MARK:
Noted.

ANN:
Then Ben reaches back into this universe bag and pulls out possible answers to his question – namely, birds pecking at seeds in the gutter; metal clip hitting against a fence post; and his artist wife working on a metal sculpture. Once again, with the exception of these possibilities, everything else in the universe remains in the bag – other people’s fence posts, gutters, and spouses, along with galaxies, electrons, love and all the rest.

MARK:
And might I say: that’s a damn huge bag!

ANN:
You’ve got that right. And finally, the question-answering process concludes when Ben goes outside and definitively finds out what was causing the “tap, tap, tap.” Everything he encounters out there is all part of the bag’s contents. Of course, everything else in the universe – which, as you said, is a helluva lot – remains in the bag, “untouched,” so to speak.

MARK:
Might I interject a sideways question here?

ANN:
Certainly.

MARK:
All the other stuff remaining in the bag – the stuff that Ben didn’t use to form his question or to answer it….

ANN:
Yes?

MARK:
They are, of course, available to form other questions and to be used to answer these other questions.

ANN:
You’ve taken over the steering wheel, my fine friend, and are now driving me to our destination.

MARK:
Well, like Dustin Hoffman said in “Rain Man,” I’m an excellent driver!

ANN:
Your penchant for both deep thought and pop culture never ceases to amaze me.

MARK:
Thank you. Now back to our discussion. What you’ve outlined makes total sense. We’ve successfully figured out how to answer an easy question.

ANN:
So now all we need to do is apply this same process to our “big” question: Why is there everything rather than nothing?

MARK:
You’ve captured my imagination, my fine friend. What can explain how everything in the universe exists, and what the purpose of it all is?

ANN:
Let’s find out by following Ben: We reach into the bag, and because our question is about everything, we select and pull out everything in the universe.

MARK:
Not surprising, since we’re asking about everything. So instead of reaching into the bag and only grabbing the “tap tap tap” sound as Ben did, we’re reaching into the bag and grabbing it all, baby! Because Ben’s question was about what caused that one sound and ours is about the entirety of the universe – which, by the way, includes Ben’s “tap tap tap” and much more.

ANN:
Precisely. But notice what happens when we do this. We’ve pulled out everything there is – everything in existence – to ask the question.

MARK:
Leaving nothing in the bag.

ANN:
Correct. Notice how different it is from what Ben experienced. Ben first reached into the bag to pull out the “tap tap tap” sound to form his question, leaving everything else in the universe in the bag. And then he reached back into the bag…

MARK:
… where there was all sorts of stuff still in there!

ANN:
Yes, so he was able to pull out “bird,” “gutter,” “fence post,” and “artist wife” to help him answer the question about what was causing the sound.

MARK:
I get it. We keep beating this dead horse, but it’s good to make sure it’s all clear: we pulled out everything – literally – from the bag to form our question, so there was nothing left over for the answer.

ANN:
Yes, and that’s why we can’t solve the problem of why there is a universe… why is there everything… what does it all mean? We have literally asked a question that cannot be answered, because every possible answer is contained in the question itself and is no longer available for the answer.

MARK:
What a bummer!

ANN:
Why do you say that?

MARK:
Well, life is such a mystery. The universe is so vast and varied. The question, “What is the meaning of it all?,” just seems to scream out at us!

ANN:
True. I can’t agree with you more. The universe is amazing. There is so much to do, see and wonder about. But questioning why it all exists can be confounding and even frustrating. But the more I think about it, the more it seems similar to other negative experiences we have in life, so it’s not that unusual to me.

MARK:
How do you mean?

ANN:
Well, you know how we all have some days when things seem to go wrong? The car won’t start, the washing machine breaks and the concert you’ve looked forward to going to is cancelled. It’s frustrating and disappointing but – as they say – “shit happens.”

MARK:
True.

ANN:
In short, it’s just part of life – unhappy as it may be.

MARK:
Indeed. As you noted, shit happens.

ANN:
Yep.

MARK:
I’ve had my share of those days, for sure. But in my “glass half full” moments, I must admit that I’ve also had days when everything falls together and goes well.

ANN:
Exactly! You get that raise at work, receive a nice long letter from an old friend and watch a beautiful sunset over the mountains. It’s joyous and gratifying.

MARK:
Ahhhh…. so true. Sometimes life is great and wonderful things happen. Once again, it’s part of life. But how does this relate to our “why everything” discussion?

ANN:
Well, our response to things speaks to our emotional state – car trouble bums us out, sunsets make us happy, and questions that can’t be answered (or asked) frustrate us.

MARK:
So these centuries-old wranglings about, “Why is there everything rather than nothing and what does it all mean?,” are not so much philosophical or scientific questions but psychological ones?

ANN:
I think that’s part of it, for sure. We may wonder about, or become frustrated when we hear or read those words uttered. And that wonder or frustration may point to our psychological or emotional state. But I see something else too.

MARK:
I’m all ears!

ANN:
I believe there is a grammatical issue with, “Why is there everything rather than nothing?” That’s why it’s so confusing from the very beginning – even before we start getting into it and try to answer it.

MARK:
How so?

ANN:
Well, it just seems like a question that could be answered. It adheres to all the rules of the English language: it begins with a capital letter, has a subject and predicate, and ends with a question mark. But I would argue that it’s not really a question, because real questions can be answered.

MARK:
But aren’t there some questions that can’t be answered? Until Isaac Newton, humans wondered why unsupported objects, such as a tossed rock, fall back to the Earth. Surely many ancient people asked why this happened but didn’t know anything about gravity. Are you saying there was no real question about why things fall to the Earth because, at the time, there was no answer?

ANN:
Not at all. There were always pre-gravity answers to the question, or at least many potential answers. Aristotle, though he knew nothing about Newton’s concept of gravity, believed things like rocks have a tendency to move toward their “natural place.” And there were doubtlessly many alternative religious explanations that would account for what we now know as “gravity.”

MARK:
I see. In fact, I’m thinking of our bag again, and in that bag are all these explanations – some of which were pulled out to explain what we now know as gravity and some that were not pulled out at the time, but all were nevertheless part of the universe.

ANN:
Precisely. In fact, centuries after Newton, Albert Einstein revolutionized the explanation of gravity by reaching into the bag and pulling out his theory of general relativity, demonstrating Newton’s explanation as being incorrect.

MARK:
So to be an actual question, it would need – at least in principle – to be able to be answered?

ANN:
Yes. Questions need to have the possibility of being answered – like Ben’s. Ours – about “everything” – doesn’t even have this possibility, because all possibilities are contained in the question. In fact, does it even make sense for there to be a question if no answer is even possible?

MARK:
I don’t think so. Questions must be paired with answers, like “heads” and “tails” are paired on a coin. You can’t have a coin with just “heads” because as soon as you flip it over…

ANN:
That’s an apt metaphor, my friend.

MARK:
I was thinking about coins because I’m about to reach into my pocket for a little money to order some more ouzo!

ANN:
Before you do, I have one final observation about this issue of “everything” we’ve been discussing.

MARK:
What is it? I’ll hitch my wagon to your star.

ANN:
As you mentioned earlier, I too believe the universe is multifaceted and wonderful, and it contains so much – in fact, it contains everything! Cool summer breezes. Amazing sunrises. Beautiful music. Meaningful discussions with friends.

MARK:
I can’t argue with that.

ANN:
All these remarkable things, events and relationships….

MARK:
… and yet there’s no explanation for them all – for everything.

ANN:
Exactly! The entire universe just is. It’s a brute fact – a fantastic, incredible and amazing one, but it just is.

MARK:
So instead of questioning the universe, we should just accept and be amazed by it?

ANN:
I believe so. It’s the starting point for everything, from our sitting here drinking ouzo to ruminating on Ben’s “tap tap tap” dilemma.

MARK:
I sure wish I could meet Ben. Does he ever come into this bar?

ANN:
He does, although lately he’s Ben Away.

MARK:
Well, I for one will be glad when he’s Ben Here again.

ANN:
Exactly. Cheers my friend, and thank you for “everything!”

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