(Do you speak German? I remember a nice passage from Thomas Mann on this topic.) — baker

No, I don't speak German, unfortunately. But I speak Russian and Kazakh, and I grew up in a culture of mutual immersion between Russian and Kazakh cultures. Perhaps this determines my thinking. Every day, when making decisions about behavior, a person here considers the experiences of both paradigms. This may seem complicated on the surface, but internally there are no contradictions. Everything always works out somehow.

Well, I admit, for me, the idea of ​​valuing the given becomes clearer with age. In my 20s and 30s, I didn't think about this, but over time, I noticed that some things no longer come as easily to me as before. Again, understanding through loss. Of course, if I start moralizing about this to my children, they simply won't understand, because they have everything ahead of them. However, these questions began to resonate with me. And, as you can see, I didn't turn to psychologists, but first came to philosophers.

I'm not arguing with you. I know some people who are so immersed in the concerns of today that they have no time for such questions. Indeed, I'm sure each of us values ​​something, otherwise we would quickly decline as a civilization. However, I'd like to clarify how exactly this valuing occurs. And what can philosophy offer here without religion?

I can't talk to philosophy or religion.

Gratitude, for me, is largely ineffable. It’s a blend of feelings; mostly an intuition that things could be otherwise, and therefore a recognition of the value in the comforts, strengths and control one (or a community) does have. Alongside this comes a feeling of good fortune and thankfulness, and perhaps, a quiet sense of relief.

I think it's also shaped by people I've known who constantly complained about not having enough, of all things being subpar and then eventually ended up sick, dying, or broke, only to learn the hard way that they had actually had it 'good' all along. Gratitude can often be a state of comparison.