Hah! I get a gig where I am. It's so fast, I post things before I type them.

People who block my path, typically slow walkers. I quite like these solutions:

Displacement aggression is such a relief. I have to displace the pissing off by pissing off something else.

Ex-spouses who think they own their children, and try to use them as leverage to get what they want.

Is it what it is?

Is what what what is?

Small talk
People who speak but don't listen
Feminism
Liberalism
Conservatism
Racism
Stupidity.

People who chew with their mouth open. And bad smells. And people who stare. And those people that snort back something through their nose.

I get pissed off by:

1. Internet forums
2. Lists
3. Irony
4. Lists
5. Repetition

I agree with number 4. The rest is just silly.

People complaining about being pissed off by things, without actually doing anything about them.

What can you do about that?

What can you do about that? — praxis

Ignore them :D

Ignore them. :D — Agustino

That won't get those slow moving sons of bitches outta my way. I prefer the solutions in my previous post.

Everyone and everything. And it's your fault. It's not like I'm hard to please or anything.

Philosophy

I used to get a thrill out of committing small social faux pas, I imagine they annoyed some people.

My favourites were:

(1) When someone asks you to guess how much something cost, make a guess which is either much larger or much smaller than the amount they're about to say, depending on the direction they intend (how cheap vs how expensive).

(2) Hold doors open for people who are greater than approximately 3 meters away, often they will half run to the door then thank you out of politeness despite the mild inconvenience and stress you have caused them.

(3) When someone is telling you a story you have heard many, many times before, interject at the punchline or critical moment by repeating it in the same tone of voice and delivery that they usually present it in.

So I suppose 'me' would be a good answer for some of the people in my life.

I used to get a thrill out of committing small social faux pas, I imagine they annoyed some people. — fdrake

Used to...?

Here are a few more:

• Accepting gratitude or praise directed at someone else.
  
• When someone you're with says "sorry" to someone, follow it up with "I'm not".
  
• If someone stutters or gets their words muddled up, mimic them immediately.

(2) Hold doors open for people who are greater than approximately 3 meters away, often they will half run to the door then thank you out of politeness despite the mild inconvenience and stress you have caused them. — fdrake

This reminds me of the time when I was a teenager and I waited at the side of the road for a car to stop to let me cross. Then, once a car had stopped, I stuck my middle finger up at the driver and walked away from the road without crossing.

I haven't done it since then, but I still find that one funny. If I did it again, I wouldn't stick my middle finger up. I would just give them a taunting grin and slowly walk away.

I made an effort to act less like a jackass when I was 21, it worked. Unfortunately maybe, but it did.

1. People not answering my questions.
2. People assuming my questions to always be sarcastic and attacking me when I'm serious.
3. People not considering other ideas.
4. People stubbornly clinging to an empty argument when it doesn't make sense.
5. People telling me my idea is wrong, but not explaining why it is wrong, and not offering a solution.
6.People.

1. Chewing gum in a professional setting. The hate I silently feel is all consuming.
2. If I ask multiple questions in an email and get a response to only some.
3. Someone having their secretary call me and then asking that I wait for them to go get them so they can talk to me.
4. Someone attempting to impose their OCD rules on me.
5. Not texting me when you're going to be late
6. Thinking your drunken humor is funny.
7. Complaining at a restaurant with an expectation you'll get something for free.
8. Using profane language in a public place.
9. Deciding what I'll eat or when I'll eat lunch for me.

I'm sure there's more.

Whistling, customers who think they're being witty by repeating the same idiotic clichés that I am forced to put up with at work (e.g. "Last of the big spenders", "I made that one this morning"), and anyone attempting to resist my imposition of OCD rules on them.

Noisy children — Sapientia

It has gotten worse. My neighbour now has a newborn. Disgusting noisy little creature. Sometimes if I accidentally drop something at night, it startles it, and it begins to let out that horrible noise until it settles back down again.

I'm rather upset you put what in between two whats. Ruined my night.

When someone you're with says "sorry" to someone, follow it up with "I'm not". — Sapientia

I usually say "Yes you are." and they look at me really weird. Most people don't know they other uses of sorry.

This reminds me of the time when I was a teenager and I waited at the side of the road for a car to stop to let me cross. Then, once a car had stopped, I stuck my middle finger up at the driver and walked away from the road without crossing. — Sapientia

When I was in college we used to play follow the leader. Sometimes there were 40 people. The first would stand at the side of the road and just and wait for a car to stop. When the car was getting ready to move the next one would step out. You can imagine how that went on. That used to get people pissed of.

I'm rather upset you put what in between two whats. Ruined my night. — Marchesk

What what did he put between which what? What what is what?

Assuming that’s a true story, forty people who waste a college education.

People who are like cats -- who are very picky about who they will talk to, socialize with, purr for, sit next to, have sex with, etc, and {i}especially when they condescend to grace one with their presence.[/i] Elitist snobs, in other words. I lift my leg on them. — Bitter Crank

Funny enough, I was going to write the complete opposite before I started reading... and the whole cat/dog dichotomy nails it much better than I could've.

I can't stand the fact that some of my friends have so little judgement about who they talk to, socialize, have sex with, etc... That they refuse to judge and understand that they are, simply, better than those they decide to spend most of their lives with, and that it could, so to speak, lower the common denominator...

The influence of evolutionary biology on ethical philosophy: everything reduced to ‘what aids survival.’