• Hanover
    12.8k
    One must take their life seriously. One must care about it. Even when one is joking, playing, etc. You must play seriously.Agustino

    What you take seriously is often what reveals your character, which is why the person who berates the waitress for his cold soup receives little respect from the person who knows the meaning of true loss. Of course you should be serious when it's a life or death issue or it's something that can avoid true suffering, but we rarely encounter that in the routine of our day, and if you find yourself being overly serious about the mundane issues of life, you're probably lacking some degree of perspective.

    And that means should I realize that you are taking things too seriously, I should simply appreciate that and not provoke you by minimizing what you hold to be serious, even though I don't think it's serious at all. One who lacks the ability to self-deprecate due to his taking life too seriously will often mistake good natured ribbing as malicious ridicule.
  • Agustino
    11.2k
    "Man is most nearly himself when he achieves the seriousness of a child at play."Erik
    (Y) If you look at the child actually, you will see just how intensely he is playing, how immersed he is into it - he does it with his entire being, it is not a half-hearted effort at all.
  • Agustino
    11.2k
    That is a dangerous question. If I am trapped in a mindset that always deals with the new in terms of the old, then for anyone to give me an answer is to again give me an old method with which to deal with the new.unenlightened
    Okay, I think I agree with you that we cannot deal with the new through a method - it is, afterall new, and methods are always old, what we develop from the past. So clearly to engage with the new completely, one must let go of methodology. Granted that this is the case, it's obvious that nobody can provide a method, so perhaps a method is not what we're looking for when we ask the question. But the question is, as you say, dangerous - if I am asking "how" it seems like any possible answer will have to be a method, a set of steps. But we have established that this isn't what we're looking for.

    So my instinct now is to ask you how do we go about approaching this unknown without appealing to the past? But I see that there is a subtle contradiction in asking that. I see that when I ask you "how", I'm asking you to appeal to the past. And that's just what the remainder of the question precludes. So what are we to do?

    If I am trapped in the known, unable to face the unknown, the answer is unknown - it must be.unenlightened
    So perhaps this is a better approach. Would engaging with the unknown sincerely, authentically, originally - would this implicate any effort of thought at all? Or would any thought about it necessarily send us to the past? Because I feel that there is a sort of relationship between thinking and the past, as all thinking relies on memory, it relies on associations we have formed in the past. Is any authentic thinking, that is entirely new and fresh possible? I don't think so - because all thought seems to be the known...

    I used to be a big fan of martial arts when I was somewhat younger. In martial arts there is an emphasis on just doing without thought - without judging whether it's correct or incorrect, without planning, without any of this. It seems to me that it is something that brings you somewhat closer to rootedness in the present...
  • Benkei
    7.7k
    now you're reminding me of philosophical authenticity.
  • Agustino
    11.2k
    philosophical authenticityBenkei
    Please... let's not get @TimeLine started :lol:
  • unenlightened
    9.2k
    So perhaps this is a better approach. Would engaging with the unknown sincerely, authentically, originally - would this implicate any effort of thought at all? Or would any thought about it necessarily send us to the past? Because I feel that there is a sort of relationship between thinking and the past, as all thinking relies on memory, it relies on associations we have formed in the past. Is any authentic thinking, that is entirely new and fresh possible? I don't think so - because all thought seems to be the known...Agustino

    This sounds right to me; effortless observation. But then you don't want your accountant to actually forget all his training and arithmetic. There needs to be an integration of seeing the new problem with a new mind, and that meeting with all the experience that is the past. Your accounts are new and unique, but they need to be sorted the same way as accounts are always sorted.
  • Hanover
    12.8k
    If you look at the child actually, you will see just how intensely he is playing, how immersed he is into it - he does it with his entire being, it is not a half-hearted effort at all.Agustino

    Being childlike is endearing. Childish, not so much.

    Silly games and silly rules is all in fun, and everyone wants to play with the fun kid, but the kid who whines, mopes, and complains at the unfairness of it all is the one no one wants to play with. I didn't at least.
  • CuddlyHedgehog
    379
    Agustino you lil whiner :razz:
  • Agustino
    11.2k
    Agustino you lil whiner :razz:CuddlyHedgehog
    Mmmm... Wanker I have been called many times before, but I do not remember any instance of whiner. You must be a first ;)
  • Agustino
    11.2k
    I believe youCuddlyHedgehog
    About which part? :P
  • Agustino
    11.2k
    all of itCuddlyHedgehog
    That is great. What reward would you like? :razz:
  • CuddlyHedgehog
    379
    a million bucks would be nice
  • Agustino
    11.2k
    a million bucks would be niceCuddlyHedgehog
    Like these bucks? :nerd:

    NAWvelvet_060711A.jpg
  • Agustino
    11.2k
    No. like these onesCuddlyHedgehog
    :eyes: I thought you are a Communist, what are you going to do with a million of them if your plan is to get rid of money? Just think how difficult it will be to throw all of it away after - it is better that I save you the trouble and not send them to you :wink:
  • CuddlyHedgehog
    379
    Trust me, I can throw it away faster than you think.
  • Agustino
    11.2k
    Hmmm, how do you achieve that? Do you have a hole in your wallet, and money just falls out, wherever you go? :lol:
  • CuddlyHedgehog
    379
    I thought you are a CommunistAgustino

    I am not a communist but I do sympathise with your inability to differentiate between political ideologies that don’t belong in the right-wing conservatism in which you reside.
  • T Clark
    13.7k
    I am not a communist but I do sympathise with your inability to differentiate between political ideologies that don’t belong in the right-wing conservatism in which you reside.CuddlyHedgehog

    Careful. I think Agustino might be falling in love with you.
  • aporiap
    223

    Adorno used to say , if you are paying attention then you can never be happy. He responded to the idiotic American "Have a nice Day". The world is full of horrors. Sometimes the only response is humour. And so to Camus and the absurd.
    Should we?
  • CuddlyHedgehog
    379
    Careful. I think Agustino might be falling in love with you.T Clark

    It’s only natural. I’m irresistible :cool:
  • BC
    13.5k
    a lot of people lack seriousnessAgustino

    This is true, but I don't think that a "lack of seriousness" is exactly what is bothering you.

    People working together in an economy establish standards of performance. This is both a top-down and a bottom-up process. McDonalds has a well-known standard of performance. So does BMW; so does Emirate Air Lines; so do a lot of businesses, industries, governments, etc. Sometimes the standard of performance followed is superb, sometimes is is abysmal.

    The standard of performance usually isn't established by one person working alone. It is usually established by many people working together in an enterprise or agency. An established standard isn't necessarily high. Some companies, industries, agencies, etc. have established low performance standards which seem resistant to improvement.

    You may have a high performance standard for yourself, but it may exceed the performance standards which (apparently quite a few) businesses in your country have established as their 'standard level of performance'. Or you are working with individual entrepreneurs who are not striving for excellence. They may not know what "excellent service" looks like. This isn't unique to where you live. In time (maybe while you are still alive) this will probably improve. But then again, maybe not.

    We all live in what is supposed to have become a 'service economy'. So why is it sometimes so damned hard to get good service? Service is bad because the standards of service business performance are not very high.

    "Serious people", that is deep thinkers who care about the world, about individuals, about doing good work, and so on are not necessarily great workers. They might be "big picture" thinkers who just don't care about the trivia of getting everything exactly right the first time around. Their heads may be in the clouds. So, you ask, "Why are you working as a janitor in this building when you really don't care how dirty the floor is?" The answer might be, "I just have to have a job so I can eat, and this was just slightly better than what else was available. To be perfectly honest, I don't care how dirty your floor is, but I do like to eat."

    Have mercy on the poor souls who can not work in the clouds where their heads are, for whom seeing the big picture (maybe really well) is just not a valued skill.
  • charleton
    1.2k
    Should we?aporiap

    Depends if you prefer crying or laughing.
  • Agustino
    11.2k
    Careful. I think Agustino might be falling in love with you.T Clark
    Hmmm, actually @T Clark, I have never loved a man as much as I love you... those Aloha shirts make you into a real gigolo. :cool: :lol:
  • T Clark
    13.7k
    those Aloha shirts make you into a real gigoloAgustino

    Giggle-O perhaps.
  • T Clark
    13.7k
    I have never loved a man as much as I love you.Agustino

    Also, keep in mind that you fail the Hannah test. You must be at least 20 years older than my daughter in order for me to have any interest in a romantic relationship. Also, I'd have to ask my wife and she is unlikely to approve. I hope you're not too disappointed.
  • Hanover
    12.8k
    Also, keep in mind that you fail the Hannah test. You must be at least 20 years older than my daughter in order for me to have any interest in a romantic relationship. Also, I'd have to ask my wife and she is unlikely to approve. I hope you're not too disappointed.T Clark

    I pass the Hannah test and your wife just told me you could join in.
  • S
    11.7k
    Since your post is quite long, I thought it might help to summarise it for those who are too busy to read the whole thing.

    - Why don't people think and act the way I want them to?
    Pseudonym

    :lol:

    @Agustino, seriously though, he has a point, and I do think that the problem, as well as the solution, ought to be simplified. In my assessment, both the problem and the solution are fundamentally about control, and my advice would be stoical in nature, as well as pragmatic. Put simply, take control. Focus less on your frustration, and focus more on doing what needs to be done. What good will bemoaning the situation do? Maybe you'll feel better afterwards, in which case, fair enough, but once you've let it out, move on. You already know what needs to be done. Either do it, or learn to accept the less-than-ideal situation you find yourself in.
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