So if the problem is that we are social animals and but other people are frustrating, how does one resolve this tension? Is it better to habituate ourselves to be alone or is it better to resign ourselves with dealing with the frustrations of other people as just the cost of being a social animal? — schopenhauer1
So if the problem is that we are social animals and but other people are frustrating, how does one resolve this tension? Is it better to habituate ourselves to be alone or is it better to resign ourselves with dealing with the frustrations of other people as just the cost of being a social animal? — schopenhauer1
Is it better to habituate ourselves to be alone or is it better to resign ourselves with dealing with the frustrations of other people as just the cost of being a social animal? — schopenhauer1
So if the problem is that we are social animals and but other people are frustrating, how does one resolve this tension? — schopenhauer1
So if the problem is that we are social animals and but other people are frustrating, how does one resolve this tension? — schopenhauer1
Humans are social animals. Yet, it is also mainly true that other people are frustrating to be around in almost every regard. That is to say, not ALL people are frustrating in every single way, but at least some people are frustrating in at least one way. — schopenhauer1
Yes, we are predominantly a social species, so communication assumes huge importance. I find this especially difficult, being an autist. Setting aside the many variations within the autistic community, most of us share communications difficulties, because we do it a little differently. I don't think it would help or entertain to delve into autistic communications any more than that, but our issues clarify the huge importance of communication to us humans. If you can't communicate easily and fluently, you are at risk of being outcast, as lepers once were.
People come in all shapes and sizes, and some of them can be difficult to get along with, as the OP observes. But we manage it anyway, or we disappear (as a species). :chin: — Pattern-chaser
So if the problem is that we are social animals and but other people are frustrating, how does one resolve this tension? Is it better to habituate ourselves to be alone or is it better to resign ourselves with dealing with the frustrations of other people as just the cost of being a social animal? — schopenhauer1
Well, I totally agree with the desire for intellectual discussions and how important the internet is to that! It isn't just that it is easier to find and engage with such people on the internet, but I find my thinking is very different when I am writing than when I am speaking. Also, I like this form of communication because I am alone but not alone. That is I am not concerned with how I look or how close to someone I sitting, or all the other concerns that come up when we meet face to face. For sure avoiding a man's sexual agenda is a huge plus to internet discussion. — Athena
When it comes to sex and romance and the desire to bond, yes, women are more hormonally geared towards bonding. They can override that, and there is a lot of pressure to that today, but even your overweight, older women are desiring that romance and bonding. They just know being obvious about that will chase the male away, while the more attractive woman works on the premise that she can have what she wants if she doesn't hang with the wrong guy, and keeps kissing frogs until she finds her prince. So for the attractive woman, it is the male who is most likely to be rejected unless he appears to want the same bonding she wants. It is hormonal. — Athena
Unfortunately, because we have diverging desires, we often have to compromise with people in order to fulfill them. — TheHedoMinimalist
Surely true, now. But we are entering a world where compromise will increasingly fade away. Real human beings in our lives will be replaced with digital entities which realistically simulate humans, and can be customized to taste. You and I are half there already in this exchange. — Jake
If there were customizable AI that designed to learn what makes you interested in talking with them, they could easily replace human conversation partners. — TheHedoMinimalist
problem is hormonal. Some of us avoid men because like you, we are perfectly happy with our independent, private lives. However, we may need help with something, or we may want a male companion, an escort to dinner, travel partner, etc. Problem is, once we start speaking with a man, our hormones can start messing things up. We may want to be intimate and that can lead to a worse hormonal problem called bonding. Then we end up fighting with ourselves with our heads screaming at us to be reasonable and the feeling self screaming at the intellectual self because the feeling self does not want to be denied and the intellectual self does not want to give up her freedom and independence and be stuck with a man. — Athena
Very important. If you know you don't want to be a father, make that very clear. Women can be totally unrealistic about this because their hormones are driving them, so talk about how awful it is to have a child with a man who doesn't one and who will not be a good father. Of course, she will think you are the perfect man because you care about such things, but you must do the impossible. You must active her reasoning. I hate it, we like to think we can have the perfect family even when we know this is unlikely. — Athena
Now I have to close because I have an agreement to meet with a man I have been avoiding. I hope when I tell him I am not Christian he will stop pursuing me, but I hope he will also be agreeable to me a renting a room from him so I can transition from one apartment complex to another, without having to sleep in my car. I hope he will take me to the Annual Steam Engine Fair this summer. :joke: It is crazy! the worst contradiction is within myself! — Athena
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