I got dumped, again. GREAT DAY!!! :confused:

So did I though I had the grace not to say so. :halo:



Hang in there. I'm sure he wasn't worth you. :strong:

I agree.

Eh, I don't know. At this rate, I'll have to go back to being Lone Wolf again... the Pessimistic Lone Wolf haha.

What a great day... parents were screaming this morning, and I get to write a research paper this week, my right hand is injured, I can't keep food down without being sick, and it is so frickin cold, and dumped by a guy I actually liked... I must be negative for awhile... *hides*

I just now formed a heavy metal band called Cosmic Vagina. I'm looking for a bass player.

I'm sorry to hear @Waya. I hope you can accomplish what you set your mind to because I know you can.

@Hanover Please delete.

What a great day... parents were screaming this morning, and I get to write a research paper this week, my right hand is injured, I can't keep food down without being sick, and it is so frickin cold, and dumped by a guy I actually liked... I must be negative for awhile... *hides* — Waya

Take refugee behind me dear forest friend, for I am a daughter of Mother Nature and her wrath is something men seem to respect. :fire:

I got dumped, again. GREAT DAY!!! :confused: — Waya

Point me in the right direction of this fool.... :brow:

Don't really care right now.
Thanks, but I still care about him...

So, full disclosure. I and Waya have been in a relationship for almost a month. I didn't dump Waya, I dumped myself; because, I can't take care of myself, am broken inside, live off of disability, and the feather that broke the camels back was when I recently decided self-medicating a stimulant (meth) would be a wise idea. The only reason I did this is that obtaining a script for Adderall or Desoxyn is too expensive for me to be able to realize. With all this shit hanging around me, I realized that Waya deserves a better boyfriend who isn't burdened with all these vices or impediments.

That's all I wanted to say.

Can I request that a moderator rename me to "Wallows".

Much appreciated.

:broken:

Oh...

So, full disclosure. I and Waya have been in a relationship for almost a month. I didn't dump Waya, I dumped myself; because, I can't take care of myself, am broken inside, live off of disability, and the feather that broke the camels back was when I recently decided self-medicating a stimulant (meth) would be a wise idea. The only reason I did this is that obtaining a script for Adderall or Desoxyn is too expensive for me to be able to realize. With all this shit hanging around me, I realized that Waya deserves a better boyfriend who isn't burdened with all these vices or impediments.

That's all I wanted to say. — Wallows

Awww Posty~~ Might you have disconnected a line that needs to be connected? I understand how someone can feel as though they are not worthy of loving attention but that is a recorded, outdated voice running though your head that needs to be overwritten.

Play with me here: List off ten things that you like about yourself:

Such as: List off ten things I like about myself;
1) I having a loving nature
2) I have witty comebacks
3) I have gorgeous brown eyes
4) I have a great deal of empathy for other people
5)……. you can see a few examples of a list of qualities I like about myself.

Now, you have to actually WRITE down the list, on a piece of paper and keep it in your pocket. Every time, not sometimes, not some of the time, not most of the time but I mean EVERY time you hear that negative voice talking to you in your head (we all have that inner voice and I am not talking about "hearing voices" as a patient diagnosed with Schizophrenia might have) EVERYTIME you pull out that list and read the full ten sentences aloud or if in public to yourself, ALL ten. If you DO it EACH and EVERY time, you will find two things: one, you have a lot of self talk going on in your head and two; after you pull that list out a few dozen times in the first hour, that you are repeating the same, outdated lines in your head. THOSE are the ones that will be re-recorded with the ten you have listed.
It works.
It is CBT.
YOU are worth the effort.
It can be done while wallowing.
The result might be that you will see what others see and that is you are worthy of loving.

Thanks, but I still care about him... — Waya

I completely understand and wish for things to work out the way they are supposed to. I just know that two members I care about are trying to help one another survive in this vicious world we live in and that is a beautiful thing. :flower:

We talked a little about my problem with substances in PM chat some time ago. Today I have a meeting at my local clinic to address that issue. ADD is a real burden and I hope my p-doc can prescribe me at least Strattera. I also need to set up an appointment with a new therapist. So, I'll be trying to work on myself in the meantime by re-reading the Enchiridion by Epictetus and the Meditations by Marcus Aurelius.

We talked a little about my problem with substances in PM chat some time ago. Today I have a meeting at my local clinic to address that issue. ADD is a real burden and I hope my p-doc can prescribe me at least Strattera. I also need to set up an appointment with a new therapist. So, I'll be trying to work on myself in the meantime by re-reading the Enchiridion by Epictetus or the Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. — Wallows

Yes, I know we did but I would never disclose such personal information without your consent. Having said that: I am thrilled to hear that you are taking a proactive position and not a reactive position to the real burdens you are bearing in life. Stay strong with your p-doc and if that Doc doesn't want to change your trajectory as much as you do, put the wheels in motion to get another Doc.
Self medicating is such a hit and miss process in an attempt to feel better and sometimes we nail it and other times we aren't as accurate. I want you to know that we are behind your push for a more balanced outlook and there is power in numbers so don't feel like you are alone in this journey we call "life".

I am thrilled to hear that you are taking a proactive position and not a reactive position to the real burdens you are bearing in life. — ArguingWAristotleTiff

What I wonder these days is if it was some self-imposed masochistic test of willpower or an exasperated desperate attempt to stop wallowing and be productive, or just some form of escapism. I'm pretty sure it wasn't pure hedonism.

I don't know the ratios of what made that idea appealing at the time; but, it won't happen again.

What I wonder these days is if it was some self-imposed masochistic test of willpower or an exasperated desperate attempt to stop wallowing and be productive, or just some form of escapism. — Wallows

Strengthening of will power can happen with support of others but that is often short lived unless it is coupled with the other possibilities you list. Feeling an exacerbation of being stuck at the same crossroads, not feeling free to choose ones' self interest, can be an agent of change my friend.
While I realize it is hard to see now and may well be veiled for all of us but you, Posty, is that Waya's degree of caring may have inspired you to chose a life not of continued suffering but to take the leap of faith we call change.

I don't know the ratios of what made that idea appealing at the time; but, it won't happen again. — Wallows

When it is harder to suffer than change, we change.

When it is harder to suffer than change, we change. — ArguingWAristotleTiff

This. :sparkle:

What a great day... parents were screaming this morning, and I get to write a research paper this week, my right hand is injured, I can't keep food down without being sick, and it is so frickin cold, and dumped by a guy I actually liked... I must be negative for awhile... *hides* — Waya

You should have sex with his best friend. Granted, that hollow empty feeling will only grow within you exponentially, but nothing is sweeter than the glory of revenge. Trust me on this one. I'm occasionally right.

What I wonder these days is if it was some self-imposed masochistic test of willpower or an exasperated desperate attempt to stop wallowing and be productive, or just some form of escapism. I'm pretty sure it wasn't pure hedonism. — Wallows

If it was escapism, it was lame. At least escape to the beach or somewhere it's warm. After that, go have sex with @Waya's ex-boyfriend. If she learns he was gay all along it will make her feel better. Please do this for the team.

@Michael

I have nothing to say to you other than to summon you over to this thread so that you can enjoy my two posts above. Enjoy.

So, full disclosure. I and Waya have been in a relationship for almost a month. I didn't dump Waya, I dumped myself; because, I can't take care of myself, am broken inside, live off of disability, and the feather that broke the camels back was when I recently decided self-medicating a stimulant (meth) would be a wise idea. The only reason I did this is that obtaining a script for Adderall or Desoxyn is too expensive for me to be able to realize. With all this shit hanging around me, I realized that Waya deserves a better boyfriend who isn't burdened with all these vices or impediments. — Wallows

I didn't read this post when I wrote my posts, so now I realize that my posts don't make a whole lot of sense because you couldn't have sex with yourself as it turns out you were her ex. Things are sort of awkward now I guess with what I said. I wish I could unsay what I said, and I guess I could by the magic of the editing button, but I think I'll just leave it all here to compound the awkwardness.

Enjoy.

The pointer is on all of you.

No. I have very little desire for that kind of stuff. Posty/wallows was pretty much the only guy who respected that and loved me for who I am rather than my body. He actually seemed to care, and I have no desire for revenge.

Thanks, yeah. I guess we both have issues... but hopefully no more crying today.

Posty/wallows was pretty much the only guy who respected that and loved me for who I am rather than my body. He actually seemed to care, — Waya

I think he does care. In fact I think, and I could be totally off base but I think, he thinks, that he cares about you soo much that he feels you can do better with someone other than himself. That is actually caring but it cuts both of you short of the CHANCE for your caring to grow.
Don't give up hope. Sometimes it takes time to realize our mistakes and only on rare occasions is that person still waiting for us. I am a hopeless romantic so I feel change is underway but the outcome is yet unknown but the odds seem to be in favor of love.