People can have feelings about the shape of their bodiesindependent of social factors, and vice versa. — Pfhorrest
Yes, because the concept of "gender" is used both to refer to the social stuff and to the feelings about your physical sex, and I want to disambiguate that, so that we can talk about one without having to talk about the other. — Pfhorrest
I didn't say that there was no nurture aspect to the causal origin of the having of the feelings about one's body. I said that one can have feelings about one thing, without necessarily having any particular feelings about the other thing.
but feeling (dis)comfort with specific bodily features generally correlated with males and females, right? Feeling (dis)comfort about having a penis/vag, breasts, body hair, etc? This is not about "identification as a" whatever, internal or external. It's about feelings about external sex features. — Pfhorrest
As the originator of the idea (of bearing): no, not really. It's meant to be about "sensations or senses of accord with one's body as it regards" sex, the physical stuff, not gender the social stuff. If you're stranded alone on a deserted island with no clothes and no other people and no job but to eat from the plentiful tropical fruits as desired, how do you feel when you look down your body and see your chest and crotch and so on? Nothing in particular because it's fine and normal? Revulsion and discomfort because it's wrong wrong wrong? "Okay I guess" but you'd rather some things be different? That's the thing I'm calling "bearing", and it is definitionally independent of social factors. (But, as elaborated before, social factors may be partially dependent on it). — Pfhorrest
People can have feelings about the shape of their bodies independent of social factors, and vice versa. I have first and third hand experience of this (recall the "transwomen tomboys" I mentioned earlier), and it such an obvious thing I cannot believe it generates any controversy. All I'm proposing is that we use different words for the different things so that we can talk about that without confusion. — Pfhorrest
For it makes it seem like as though bearing - feeling - arises ex nihilo, in a vacuum, or at least in the mode of a kind of natural spontaneity uninfluenced or uninflected by environment. But to want to feel like a woman (say), is at least in part to want to be treated like a woman, or aspire to ‘womanly’ things (dress, affection, sensibility), to be able partake in the gendering process which exists only at the level of the social and not at all wholly at the level of the psychological. — StreetlightX
People can have feelings about the shape of their bodies independent of social factors, and vice versa. I have first and second hand experience of this (recall the transwomen tomboys I mentioned earlier), and it such an obvious thing I cannot believe it generates any controversy
You understand that I'm not talking about "feeling like I am an [x]", but feeling (dis)comfort with specific bodily features generally correlated with males and females, right? — Pfhorrest
particularly strong feelings about that thing, [...] would probably not like the idea of being made male, I would guess? You may not normally think at all about preferring to remain female, [....] — Pfhorrest
I didn't say that there was no nurture aspect causal role [...]
Then again say:
— Pfhorrest
People can have feelings about the shape of their bodies independent of social factors, and vice versa. — Pfhorrest
You can see why it would be useful to be able to talk about one of these things without being confused for talking about the other, right? — Pfhorrest
Though perhaps you imagine Bearing1 generating feelings of disaccord with the performative aspect of sociological gender and disaccord with social norms, so there's never any mediation of our sensations through the social contexts learned in the experiential history of our bodies. — fdrake
Something I was thinking about on the way home was if we imagine a scenario of a baby growing up in a cell with no human contact, it's fed by an automatic feeding tube. Trying to convey to the adult produced by this what affection felt like would probably require describing it in terms of the feeding tube and hunger; and to those of us who have felt affection, we know this could never suffice. — fdrake
The difference with bearing, I think, is that it should be easy for a cis person to imagine how they would feel if they had bodily features of the opposite sex, and so get a comparable mental picture of how someone who feels discomfort with their body feels. (If said person does not find themselves imagining discomfort at that scenario, then I would say by definition that makes them not cis. Maybe not trans either, but some kind of nonbinary.) — Pfhorrest
I don't think this is right. I'm cis, I can quite happily imagine body-swapping with a woman friend, and would rather enjoy what it felt like to have a body with tits, but the matter is mostly indifferent to me. Give it or take it, it's not a need I have based on internal conflict. I really don't think it's easy to imagine what it is like to inhabit a trans person's body for a cis person.
↪fdrake I don't want to tell someone that they're "identifying wrongly" or anything, but your description of your feelings sound like textbook "agender". I think a lot of people think of themselves as "cis" just because they're not "trans", but there's a whole spectrum in between. — Pfhorrest
So I understand that people who feel no particular discomfort with the bodies they were born with -- and to clarify, I am okay with the body I was born with, and wouldn't call myself dysphoric, which is why I don't call myself trans -- who wouldn't mind if their bodies were different might think, like I did for a while, that everybody who isn't trans is like that. But there are other people who are much more strongly "un-trans" than that, and I'm pretty sure that those people are supposed to be the referents of "cis", with people in between being something in between. And, just like the Kinsey scale results show that a lot more people are more bisexual/pansexual/etc than we think, I suspect that a lot more people are somewhere more toward the middle of the spectrum than strictly cis, even if they still lean toward the cis side of things. — Pfhorrest
That is because he is talking about dysphoria; and viewing everything through a dsyphoric lens, and seeing what is in this lens to be consistent among vast amounts of people (we are 'dysphoric' or 'mistyped'), and this is the case. It is not the case. And it is nonsense. Empty tags with no shag. — Swan
What seems intuitive to me is that cisgender people are so identified (enfleshed?) with their sex that it becomes transparent to them, there are no distinctions and sites of tension that would furnish any Bearing1 sensations — fdrake
I've been proposing for a while now that that last property should get a new name different from "gender", and I propose "bearing". Part of that is because gender dysphoria and euphoria are all about this property, the psychological feeling of (dis)comfort in a particular kind of body, and the root "-phor" means "to bear". (And similarly, rather than "transgender", "cisgender", etc, as values for this property, we could use "transphoric", "cisphoric", etc: "bearing across", "bearing to the same side", etc.) Also because "bearing" makes a nice navigational metaphor with "orientation": if you imagine an abstract space of sex characteristics, and a person moving about in that space, their orientation is where in that space they're facing (the type of sex they're looking at), while their bearing is where in that space they're heading (the type of sex they're aiming to be). But also, perhaps as a transitional compromise, we could just disambiguate the word "gender" between all three of these things with qualifiers: "psychological gender" for bearing, "sociological gender" for the original sense of the word, and if we really have to, "physical gender" for sex. The important part, though, is just that we keep these three different things separate: enough people already are getting out the message that the physical and sociological are separate, but I think it would do a lot of good for everyone is we could also keep the sociological and psychological separate. — Pfhorrest
I'm having a little trouble understanding you, but it sounds to me like you're thinking of psychological bearing as being a feeling about sociological gender, when I explicitly mean it not to be; that's what "gender identity" already accurately describes. — Pfhorrest
By listening to people talk about it? — Pfhorrest
All I'm saying is that you can have feelings about the sex of your body, and at the same time, not necessarily have any particular feeling or another about social stuff; that those two things can in concept vary independently, and saying something about one doesn't have to say something about the other. I'm saying nothing at all about what does or does not cause the feelings about the sex of your body.
Mom reports from his earliest years Andrew preferred dresses, playing with make-up and dolls – At 3yo Andrew asked his parents to buy him feminine clothing, a wig – On a number of occasions, he tells his parents “I’m a girl” – At 4yo he tells his mother “I can’t wait to get to heaven to be a girl” – – Visited their pediatrician – “it’s just a phase” – A year ago, parents allow him to wear dresses/skirts inside the home (they note that he’s so much happier during these times) – Mom, tearfully explains “He’s so insistent - it’s beginning to feel oppressive - not allowing him to be who he is” – Notice he’s becoming more withdrawn, starting to avoid school
Without pressure to conform, children may not be dysphoric
The problem is "blue bin" and "green bin" both have the same necessary attributes to be the "same bins, in different clothing". — Swan
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