• Bob Ross
    1.5k


    That's fair. I guess I just value it strongly. I don't like people that are just regurgitations of their society's norms, like a leaf getting blown in the wind.
  • Bob Ross
    1.5k


    That is fair. Although I am not a Christian.
  • BitconnectCarlos
    2.1k


    Doesn't matter. Jesus is a character in a book.
  • RogueAI
    2.8k
    You might meet some intellectually stimulating/philosophical people volunteering for a (liberal) political campaign.
  • Bob Ross
    1.5k
    Probably, but I am conservative.
  • jgill
    3.7k
    ↪RogueAI
    Probably, but I am conservative.
    Bob Ross

    Go to a Republican fundraiser and see what happens. Do not mention anything philosophical. Complement a young lady on her MAGA cap.
  • Bob Ross
    1.5k


    Lol. Maybe.

    I do agree that not mentioning philosophy is better at attracting women. I am pretty sure philosophizing is a turn-off for the vast majority of humans (to my shock and dismay).
  • L'éléphant
    1.5k

    You'll find your partner unexpectedly.
  • javi2541997
    5.5k
    You'll find your partner unexpectedly.L'éléphant

    I agree. But that might mean @Bob Ross would have to stop finding a suitable partner. So, the only way to meet a suitable person is to stop looking for her (him), because she (he) will show up unexpectedly.

    Hmm... is this a paradox?
  • Mikie
    6.6k
    my search for my soulmateBob Ross

    Mistake.

    I wonder: are there any good ways to meet an intellectually substantive partner (viz., perhaps a philosopher)?Bob Ross

    No. There are no philosophers anymore. And if there are, you won’t find them.

    Both are silly mistakes. No soulmates; no philosophers. Who would even want that?

    Looks like you need a nerdy girl. They’re probably the best ones anyway, in the scheme of things.

    Good luck out there.
  • Benkei
    7.6k
    Nature has an excellent process for this; it's called attraction. It's worked for millions of years. If you're attracted to him/her, go for it. If not, ignore. From personal experience, people overthink the whole process. It doesn't require deep analysis. Some people will throw themselves at you and we're all only human and might have sex or one-night stands. Nothing wrong with that but don't confuse sex and lust with attraction. They're not the same. The second can lead to love, the first won't.

    Also, "soul mates" is an overromantisation. Like any relationship, communication is key as well as recognising other people's moods as well as your own to avoid feeding negative feedback loops. How a discussion about doing the dishes will lead to divorce is because people just keep adding oil to the fire.
  • Benkei
    7.6k
    Looks like you need a nerdy girl. They’re probably the best ones anyway, in the scheme of things.Mikie

    Only partially right. She needs to be Christina, because christian girls have never been taught what not to do in bed.
  • javi2541997
    5.5k
    How a discussion about doing the dishes will lead to divorce is because people just keep adding oil to the fire.Benkei

    Yeah, but what I have never understood is why those kinds of couples are still together despite they keep adding oil to the fire. It seemed to me that they just "love" that. The thorny feeling of constant confrontation...
  • fishfry
    3.4k
    Does anyone know of any dating apps or places to be, where people seeking a deep, long-term relationship with an intellectually substantive partner go?Bob Ross

    Get with the program, man. AI partners are the way to go.

    https://romanticai.com/

    ps -- I played around with this. It's an uncanny chatbot. Once they get this tech into the life sized love dolls, nobody will need real people. We're all simulations anyway, so I'm told. Here you go, $577 on Amazon. Searching "sex dolls" brings up lady dolls, must be more demand for that, not assuming anything about anyone's sexual preferences.

    https://www.amazon.com/Realistic-Breast-Silicone-Pleasure-62-2Inch/dp/B0CTJV3BQ1/ref=sr_1_1

    Free shipping!

    [Now Amazon will remember I looked this up forever]

    Also, if you're looking for mentally stimulating companionship, Woody Allen wrote a story about hookers who specialize in intellectual conversation.

    Well, I heard of this young girl. Eighteen years old. A Vassar student. For a price, she’ll come over and discuss any subject—Proust, Yeats, anthropology. Exchange of ideas. You see what I’m driving at?

    The Whore of Mensa
  • Bob Ross
    1.5k


    :up:

    I would still like to strive towards finding my soulmate, although I agree it is very unlikely, while maintaining an open-mind to those who may not fit the exact description.
  • Bob Ross
    1.5k


    AI girlfriends are wholly inadequate substitutes for real girlfriends.
  • Moliere
    4.5k
    Does anyone know of any dating apps or places to be, where people seeking a deep, long-term relationship with an intellectually substantive partner go?Bob Ross

    I have no tips for partners. Love is a queer thing, which some say is its attraction.


    But for intellectually substantive long-term relationships: I can say a little on that. And really, I have a hard time thinking that finding a partner is much different in terms of finding someone compatible. (not sure if there is a method for anything more certain, which is part of the anxiety -- and perhaps even joy -- of the task) -- on that, I find most of my friends from similar interests. Usually there are local groups interested in similar-ish enough things, and really that's what church is basically about: building community together, which happens to include partner-matching in various rituals.

    So: commune with people in things you like, keep an open eye, and wait until you feel the moment is right I suppose is my thought. After that: ask someone else.
  • Benkei
    7.6k
    Love is a queer thingMoliere

    Only if you're gay...
  • javi2541997
    5.5k
    Love is a queer thing,Moliere

    Only if you're gay...Benkei

    I don't get what you mean, Benk.
  • Bob Ross
    1.5k


    See that's the problem: there aren't any congregations for people who think deeply but don't subscribe to a mainstream religion...or at least none that I know of. Where's the aristotelian club??? (;
  • wonderer1
    2.1k
    Looking into what groups can be found through meetup.com might be worthwhile.
  • L'éléphant
    1.5k
    But that might mean Bob Ross would have to stop finding a suitable partner. So, the only way to meet a suitable person is to stop looking for her (him), because she (he) will show up unexpectedly.

    Hmm... is this a paradox?
    javi2541997

    You missed the point. Obviously, he's dismayed at the artificiality of the infrastructure for finding suitable mates. And he's dismayed at the type of people that gather in such platform. Then why go there?

    No -- the "suitable partner" is not going to show up unexpectedly. The connection, while he is spending time at some place, is the unexpected one.
  • Moliere
    4.5k


    My "congregations" were theatre troupes, and I have no regrets.

    @unenlightened said the right things. If you connect then that's a good promise, though it may end in disappointment.

    Love is more an act of feeling and giving than an act of calculation, though our current world requires us to think in those terms (due to patrilineal laws, etc.)

    Even so: I'm certain you can find bookish and contemplative persons who don't just want what seems superficial.

    In fact I'd say that's what most people are looking for. (heh, not the "bookish", but the "not superficial")
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