To you I will appear an idiot. — Bartricks
I cannot speak for anyone else, but I disagree with this. I only know you based on your writing, but based on that it is clear that you are highly informed and intelligent. You just have this blind spot, you're stuck in this "philosophical loop".
Throughout history people much, much smarter than you have attempted to explain/understand what the sentence "God exists" actually means - and they have all failed. The very concept of a deity, god, omniscient being (whatever term you choose to use) is illogical down to its core. You cannot use logical reasoning to prove something illogical.
Based on your writing I'm assuming that you hold some sort of religious belief and that your religious beliefs are important to you - and that's OK. That does not pose a problem for me. But for some reason you cannot accept that this is simply a belief. At the risk of doing an amateur psychoanalysis of someone based on their writings on an internet forum, the sense I get is that there is something inside of you that feels threatened by the notion that there is no logical explanation for your core beliefs.
There is a word for this feeling inside of you - cognitive dissonance. Your desire to believe in God and you desire for there to be logical explanations for this belief are mutually contradictory and this creates an uncomfortable feeling inside of you - a conflict if you will. But instead of rejecting one of these two contradictory notions, you are attempting to do the impossible - use logic (Reason, ratiocination, etc) to prove something illogical.
Again, people much, much smarter than you have attempted to do this and have all failed You're a smart person, but you're no St. Barticks.
Oh, wait a minute, Dunning Kruger - you're an expert and I'm someone who has a smattering of knowledge but lacks the meta-cognitive ability to recognize his limitations. Well, yes. I recognize that I am not an expert in philosophy. I would never argue some fine point about Anselm's take on, umm. . . . . well I hardly know anything about him at all. I would have to google just to remind myself who he was.
BUT - you don't need to be an astronomer to know that the moon orbits around earth and that earth orbits around the sun. You don't need a PhD in History to know that George Washington was the first president of the US. And you don't need to know the first thing about Anselm to recognize that there is no fucking way that you can use logic (Reason, ratiocination, etc) to prove this sentence is true:
There is an omniscient being who has the ability to create a square circle in a galaxy 20 billion light years away if He so chose, but He has not done this.
To use the vernacular, this is just bat shit crazy.
Why an otherwise intelligent person cannot recognize this baffles me.
BUT - maybe I'm wrong. Maybe right now - in this very exchange - I'm demonstrating a classic case of Dunning Kruger and these posts will be quoted 100 years from now. So in your response to me (and I know you will respond) please demonstrate the logic that proves the sentence just above. Give me your definitions/premises and how you arrived at your conclusion.
If you can do this then you are truly a genius of the highest caliber.