GUILT, HELPLESSNESS, HATE

- for enjoying modern day comforts knowing that these are built upon the immense suffering of countless generations before us and the continued suffering of marginalized people in some not-so-remote place

- for the very being of your existence means that you have to burden other people at work to ask favors, at your leisure time for other people to entertain you, and eventually when you get disabled for other people to look after you

- for thinking badly of your work that puts food on the table; of your colleagues for burdening you with tedious work then eventually try to convince yourself that somehow it's just part of their job and the system;

- for believing that other people are fellow sufferers but feel completely powerless to comfort them; for having to go to vacation and have to see stories of suffering play at the back of your mind for each stranger that you encounter

- for failing to be a bottomless source of joy to others in this world of selfishness; because you too are human; and when people fault you for your moment of weakness, you doubt whether it was your fault all along

- for not even being strong enough to keep your own troubles and weakness to yourself that you risk showing a crack that may cause worry or fear to people around you

- for feeling hopeless as you watch in the sidelines as you imagine close acquaintance's kids have to suffer and eventually perpetuate the cycle of suffering when they grow old


#badday #badweek