Blame Blame is social engineering.
If you think that there ought to be a social element to human life then concepts of blame and shame are going to be part of the world we construct for ourselves.
No matter how much we feel that the criteria of blame, shame and punishment can be objective, they in fact have to measure up against a range of concepts offered us by cultural logic, and these will be specific to the historical and cultural milieu of the moment.
What you do not get to do is to try to pretend that human urges are unnatural no matter how much they contravene current social norms.
From the age of 11 every man each morning wakes up with a natural urge to penetrate. To varying degrees a man's social life is based on the suppression of the natural urge to comply with socio-cultural norms. This can be expressed heterosexually, homosexually or even paedophilically. The urge is not a choice; compliance is.
Successful compliance is based to some degree on the likelihood of censure should a transgression be discovered.
For example; since the likelihood of any danger of so much as an accusation of rape by a woman is low, the incidence of rape is high. Conviction rates are also extremely low, and this obviously is a contributory factor as to why rape is at epidemic proportions now and throughout history.
Times change.
Rape was common in ancient Greece, appearing in many day to day myths. The earliest (surviving) law code; The Gortyn code; rape is punishable by a fine. By today's standards the Code reads more like a shopping list, than a law code with different prices for rape by a freeman, or slave upon a freeperson or slave. A slave raping a freeman had the highest price; the lowest, no surprisingly was a freeman raping a slave.
It does not take much imagination to understand that raping outside the group was not thought of as criminal in most of history.