As to what parents are reponsible for, they are partially responsible for every kind of suffering their child experiences except in the case where the child willingly brings harm to himself despite being warned by them that that would happen. If the child is harmed in any way that he didn't bring upon himself fully they are partially responsible. — khaled
Suppose while I was at the store you finished building a model of the Eiffel Tower out of popsicle sticks, and left it sitting on the kitchen table so that I would see it when I got back. I come in with bags of groceries and put them on the kitchen table as always, in the process knocking your model, which I hadn't noticed, to the floor; it will need considerable repair.
You might get mad at me for knocking over your model, and I might defend myself by saying you shouldn't have put it there in the first place. You say it's my fault; I say it's yours. One way people resolve this sort of dispute is for both sides to admit they were "partly responsible".
What's going on here? Is there a fact of the matter about who is responsible?
We can analyse what happened, in the old-fashioned sense of splitting up the sequence of events that led to the model's injury: it's clearly only on the table because you put it there and you could have done otherwise, so that's on you; it only fell to the floor because I knocked it over and I could have done otherwise, so that's on me. Neither of us intended the final event in the chain to happen, and the final event in the chain would not have happened if we had not both done things we accept responsibility for.
Is that a proof that we each bear "partial responsibility"? Are we both logically compelled to accept this answer? I think no, and no. Either of us could dig in and argue that it's "really" the fault of the other. (I'll spare you the arguments, and assume you can fill them in yourself, though I find them pretty interesting.) I think both accepting some "share" of the blame is just a way of saying we've decided not to argue about whose fault it "really" is.
But is there a fact of the matter about whose fault it really is? If so, is it something we could discover? (Maybe we abandon the search not because there's no answer but because we know it's probably out of reach.)
If a drunk driver kills somebody, is the bartender who served them partly responsible? What about the dealer that sold him the car? If a man shoots some people at a nightclub for some idiosyncratic reason, is the gun dealer who sold him the weapon partly responsible? What about the company that manufactured the weapon? If I'm prone to take your books without asking, and you know this, and you leave a book you know I want in the living room, are you partly responsible for me taking it? I'll bet most people who read such questions have a gut reaction of yes or no to each, but that they're not all the same, and some people would think they need more information before they can judge. There are so many "variables", and your judgment of responsibility can swing back and forth with each detail I could add to a story; why is that?
It seems to me you feel compelled by logic to say that parents are partly to blame for any suffering their child experiences because the child could not experience that suffering if they hadn't been born -- though you also carve out a really precise exception to that. (And exactly the same argument could apply to any joy that child experiences, any harm that child does to others, any good that child does for others, and so on.) Are you compelled by logic to specify that exception?
@schopenhauer1 isn't. Is one of you right? What about the grandparents? Partly to blame? I think you'll say no, but schop will say yes. Same for the grandkids. And so on. Whose fault is everything really?
I think you have it in mind that genuine responsibility can be assessed, though in practice it might sometimes be impossible, through a careful analysis of causes. And you're willing to make distinctions: people are only responsible for a subset of what they cause -- namely the subset that nothing else would have caused if they hadn't. And you'll keep going like this, making finer distinctions if necessary.
So what's wrong with that? Don't we have to analyse causes to assess responsibility?
Broadly, yes, but it's nowhere near all we do, and we certainly don't think we can just
derive our moral positions from a completed analysis of causes, not in the way you expect to be able to.
How we go about analysing causes is shaped from the beginning by our moral intuitions, and this is clear in the disagreement I posited, accurately or not, between you and schop over your exception to the rule. Why that exception? Why in that form? You've clearly iterated here to add the "parents explicitly warning against" bit. Are you sure you're done? Couldn't we parse that further? Couldn't I still be partly responsible if I warn you not to do something but I'm not certain you understood me? What if I give you a blanket warning to do nothing that might lead to you suffering, is that okay? Am I now absolved of all responsibility for you?
On top of that, our moral intuitions are themselves part of the story of what we do and why we do it. But not on your approach; you intend to complete the analysis of causes first and let the chips fall where they may. Neither you nor schop are willing to consider our intentions. Sure that's a minefield for ethics, and some people choose just to go around it, but from a strictly causal point of view you could take into account beliefs and where they come from. If I tell you something and you believe it and act on it, why am I not partly responsible for what you do? Or am I? Oh wait! We've already been here, because this is precisely the territory of your exception.
If you need further proof that there is more to moral judgment than a moral principle (do no harm) and an objective analysis of causes, consider anti-natalism. It's a dead simple argument that almost no one accepts. Your explanation is, I believe, that people just don't think about it. (And if your mood or personality is especially pessimistic, you might explain that by their selfishness or stupidity or laziness when it comes to thinking about anything. Or not.) But you know for a fact that's false, because hardly anyone you've ever presented the argument to accepted it, right? So now you need to claim that they're not logical, maybe not even capable of being logical (again, some extra pessimism), or that they're capable of it but engaging in motivated reasoning that blocks the inference they really should make.
As far as you're concerned, the only option available for rejecting anti-natalism is denying the principle that is applied
after the causal analysis is done: if someone wants to say, yeah I'm down with causing unjustified suffering, you pack up your argument and leave. They can fail morally, fail intellectually or they can agree with you. But you're wrong. It's a stupid argument, and that's the reaction you're getting from almost everyone you present it to. It is literally stupid, in the sense of not knowing or pretending not to know something everyone knows, that if you're going to talk about who caused what to happen you're
already swimming in moral seas.