First - why does it have such an effect upon people? Where does its sting come from? Let's think about both the celibate here and the indulgent - taking the two extreme cases. Why do both of them suffer? — Agustino
Since the psyche of mankind is open before us, presumably we can take steps to alter it. — Agustino
Third - how is one to live in a sexually obsessed society without being themselves sexually obsessed? — Agustino
It seems that we are sort of cursed precisely because we - unlike animals - can form fantasies, and so we must learn how to relate with them, without crushing the boundary that always necessarily exists between fantasy and reality. — Agustino
But in the past, they never acted on it - they never confused fantasy with reality. — Agustino
I think this collapsing of the boundary between fantasy and reality is one of the biggest problems of modern society. People are no longer able to enjoy their fantasises without seeking to bring them into reality, and out of the realm of phantasma. In fact, they confuse reality with fantasy, and this confusion underlies all of the problem. — Agustino
Sex is often a requirement in modern relationships because most people, in my experience at least, are in fact mortified at the thought of having true intimacy with someone because it means that they must expose the worst in them, which forces them to expose themselves to themselves, as well, often for the first time. — Heister Eggcart
This is one reason why successful marriages in the West have rapidly deteriorated because spouses realize too late that they do not know who really is next to them when they go to bed each night.
Modern relationships have gone about creating a culture that overemphasizes the gruff physicality of the body, and therefore of sex, as being the foundation for the growth of a relationship between two people. No one gives a hot damn about virtue, only whether you like fleshy dicks or plastic dicks, if you like it in the butt, in the mouth, or in the nose, whether you like black hair over blonde hair, tan skin instead of pale skin - honesty, though? Attentiveness, understanding, compassion? Meh.
I do! :DNo one gives a hot damn about virtue, only whether you like fleshy dicks or plastic dicks, if you like it in the butt, in the mouth, or in the nose, whether you like black hair over blonde hair, tan skin instead of pale skin — Heister Eggcart
Yes, the state of being isolated from the family, because you cheated, sounds like alienation to me for sure.the state or experience of being isolated from a group or an activity to which one should belong or in which one should be involved: unemployment may generate a sense of political alienation.
This applies too.a feeling of disconnection from the larger society
This as well - cheating causes a loss of sympathy between the two people. When you wife cheats on you, you certainly don't have the same sympathy for her that you had before, nor the same trust.loss or lack of sympathy; estrangement — Bitter Crank
Ehmm this sounds kind of fishy - especially since you compare it to eating and breathing. What do you mean? If I don't eat and breathe I die. If I don't have sex, I also die? — Agustino
What is the generalised human mind apart from its specific instantiations?It's not all about you. You die whatever you think or do. The psyche is the generalised human mind, and if in general humanity is not concerned with sex, humanity dies. Sex is not necessary to the individual, but it is absolutely necessary to the species. — unenlightened
... the media must give people what they want in order to earn from them. — Agustino
What is the generalised human mind apart from its specific instantiations? — Agustino
But this generalised mind is precisely the average, which is what I am talking about. Most people are sexually obsessed, otherwise they wouldn't be listening to such adverts - like for example I don't listen or watch them, and find them annoying. What am I getting wrong there?The generalised human mind is what psychology studies. It is the average, the percentile. UNcorp doesn't care whether you buy its products or not, as long as 'people' do. — unenlightened
:-O >:OThought germs are everywhere, rotting your brain, and there is nothing you can do about it. Until now! Researchers at UNcorp have devised the first and only protective head gear for you and your loved ones that will kill 99% (recognise that figure?) of all intrusive thoughts. Also available in pill form. — unenlightened
I don't listen or watch them, and find them annoying. What am I getting wrong there? — Agustino
Then why do they watch them? If you find something annoying it's right to not watch it, and seek to avoid it when possible, isn't it? They certainly MUST like it on some level, don't they?Everyone finds them annoying; they are designed to upset. This is the whole foundation of consumer society. We at UNcorp set out to upset you, annoy you, make you anxious and fearful.
Because then you will want the cure for the disease we have created in you. Buy UNcorp's UNique UNderstanding today, not because you're worth it, though we'll tell you you are because we want you to love us, but because you are annoyed and upset.
And here is UNcorp's first rule of advertising:
Incomplete sentences, because if it doesn't quite say anything, it's not quite a lie. — unenlightened
... the media must give people what they want in order to earn from them. — Agustino
This is not at all correct. The media manufacture want. — unenlightened
N. W. Ayer suggested that through a well-orchestrated advertising and public-relations campaign it could have a significant impact on the "social attitudes of the public at large and thereby channel American spending toward larger and more expensive diamonds instead of "competitive luxuries." Specifically, the Ayer study stressed the need to strengthen the association in the public's mind of diamonds with romance. Since "young men buy over 90% of all engagement rings" it would be crucial to inculcate in them the idea that diamonds were a gift of love: the larger and finer the diamond, the greater the expression of love. Similarly, young women had to be encouraged to view diamonds as an integral part of any romantic courtship.
...
By 1941, The advertising agency reported to its client that it had already achieved impressive results in its campaign. The sale of diamonds had increased by 55 percent in the United States since 1938, reversing the previous downward trend in retail sales.
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In its 1947 strategy plan, the advertising agency strongly emphasized a psychological approach. "We are dealing with a problem in mass psychology. We seek to ... strengthen the tradition of the diamond engagement ring -- to make it a psychological necessity capable of competing successfully at the retail level with utility goods and services...."
But surely a diamond is only valuable because it's hard to get. — Agustino
Not necessarily. If I spend three months making a very exquisite and beautiful dress for my wife she will most likely appreciate the gift even though it's not in "high demand". It's the effort that I make to get it that matters. Not just high demand and low supply. As I illustrated with Bill Gates, if he makes the same low supply and high demand gift as I do to my wife, his wife wouldn't be as happy, because he makes less effort for it compared to me.Low supply and high demand. Something in low supply but also low demand isn't going to be worth much. It was the media campaign that put diamonds into high(er) demand, which in turn increased their value. — Michael
We are dealing with a problem in mass psychology. We seek to ... strengthen the tradition of the diamond engagement ring -- to make it a psychological necessity capable of competing successfully at the retail level with utility goods and services....
Not necessarily. If I spend three months making a very exquisite and beautiful dress for my wife she will most likely appreciate the gift even though it's not in "high demand". It's the effort that I make to get it that matters. Not just high demand and low supply. As I illustrated with Bill Gates, if he makes the same low supply and high demand gift as I do to my wife, his wife wouldn't be as happy, because he makes less effort for it compared to me. — Agustino
But surely a diamond is only valuable because it's hard to get — Agustino
You're saying that many people want to avoid intimacy, therefore sex is a requirement in modern relationships? — jamalrob
Do you mean sexual or romantic relationships? — jamalrob
I'm pretty sure that sex has been essential to a very large portion of human relationships for a very long time. — jamalrob
And you assume, without any justification, that sex is not a part of being intimate with someone, but is rather a way of avoiding intimacy. — jamalrob
I'm open to the idea that there might be a new and increasingly widespread way of relating to people sexually that excludes intimacy--a kind of relationship that we might call pornographical, both because it is primarily objectifying and also because pornography increasingly shapes our sexualities--but this is a long way from saying that sex per se is an avoidance of intimacy. — jamalrob
This is simply not credible. Do you think that when divorce was taboo and women were subjected to the authority of the husband, "true intimacy" flourished? Do you think that when marriage was more openly and uncontroversially about property and status, couples really got to know each other? Do you not realize that it's only recently that romantic love has become the primary reason for getting married? — jamalrob
This demonstrates prudishness and little else. You do realize that attentiveness, understanding, and compassion, along with gruff physicality, are often essential to good sex? — jamalrob
>:O so true, so true...You do realize that virtue has nothing to do with how your penis feels when in this or that crevasse, right? — Heister Eggcart
You do realize that virtue has nothing to do with how your penis feels when in this or that crevasse, right? — Heister Eggcart
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