I really don't know, and all I can do is self report what I feel. Intellectually, it's all over my head and when you go back that far, the history of it all gets really murky, the etymological roots run this way and that. Personally, I worship the
Great I Am. That is the name given in the Bible that I most identify with, or that most resonates with me. Whether that was El or Jehovah or Yahweh, I really don't feel the need to make absolute certain.
All I know is that there is a being who exists and was not created. Jesus is the intermediary, as i'm sure you know, so all prayers sort of default to Him. These beings are ineffable in nature, and myself being a mere mortal with limited ability to comprehend such transcendent truths, I have learned over the years to keep it simple.
I've spoke with a few friends of mine who are well educated in all this, and they all pretty much lay out historical theories of how these names evolved. I really don't feel that the ultimate God, the Great I Am, is too much concerned with whether or not I get these facts hammered out. I do know Jesus though, and I have His Words and His Acts that I can learn and meditate on in my heart. Other than that, any contemplation that I do is on the wonder and awe of an ineffable God that is the all encompassing definition of existence and being.
What's the Father's Name? I really don't know. I understand that the ancient Hebrews wouldn't speak or write His Name. I know little factoids like that that add up to me concluding that it's not a big deal for me to know this stuff, and there are simply too many conflicting views and conclusions on the matter that suggest I am not alone.
So as far as my focus goes when praying or worshipping, I guess it may go back and forth between the man Jesus and the ineffable force that is the Father. They're one and the same anyway, in a sense. As I said, all of this I believe is not really to be rationally understood, but rather contemplated in the Spirit, so that we may remain humble before the Almighty.
Things that aren't too clear, I don't believe God really wants me to put a whole lot of energy into investigating. There are some things that are clear and plain as day to me, and other things that are dark and murky. I want to stay in the Light and not wander too far in to the dark. Now that may be just where I am at the moment, at this time of my life, but there is a personal unction for me from God to keep it simple. God's Word is a light unto my path and a lamp unto my feet, and right now, the only place that is illuminated and where I feel safe is underneath the Shadow of His Wings.
There is a mind that is self existent, eternal. That much I know for certain. There is a being that sees and knows all. It would also seem to me that this being is triune in some sense, and is reflected in the fundamental triune nature of reality.
As far as the story of Lilith goes, that may or may not be true. Again, I can't really see what bearing that has on the story of Jesus. I think it's interesting though!
Here's an interesting response I got from someone:
"Actually, El was the generic name for any heavenly being. The "sons of 'el (bene elohim) were "el " in their own right. Had a great discussion with former Mormon apologist Kevin Graham on the origin of the word "el" and he taught me quite a bit about pre-Hebrew assimilation of terms like YHWH. It was his assertion that the YHWH who was the consort of Ashera and the brother of Ba'al was not the same YHWH as the Hebrews worshipped, but that the name YHWH was assimilated from one to the other."
Things get assimilated by ancient cultures, then the evolution goes this way and that way and it's like trying to look at pre-history through a kaleidoscope.