Who should be allowed to wear a gun (and use it)? — Prishon
A useful approach to determining 'who should wear a gun' is to apply strict standards of attractiveness and style.
"Does a gun look good on this person?"
"Do the person's clothing choices add to, or detract from appearance of the gun? And visa versa?
"Does wearing a gun match their general style of dress, comportment, make-up, hair, gait, pitch of voice, cock size, and so forth?
No one should be allowed to make up for a little dick by wearing a big gun.
Clearly short fat people should not be allowed to wear a gun or guns, just as they should not be allowed to wear blue suede shoes, pink pants, a teal colored shirt, and an orange jacket. Fat people wearing lycra are disgusting, and so are fat people with two guns hanging from a gun belt. Just stupid. Fat people wearing lycra are too attractive a target for their own good.
Women may be allowed to carry a gun in their purse, provided the purse is attractive and the gun is small and easily handled. Hauling a sawed off shotgun out of a Hermés Birkin bag is just not done in America or any place else. Well, maybe in Venezuela, these days.
Male gun wearers should be unconditionally handsome, at least as tall as average, but not too tall; physically fit, dressed in rugged clothing featuring perfectly faded denim, earth tones, brown leather boots, etc. They should be visibly well hung, too, Might as well have the complete package. (Note "puny dick/no gun" rule.)
Acne-pocked youth should definitely not wear guns. Republicans, especially, should not be allowed to wear guns, considering how unsightly Donald and Mitch are. Homely hookers should not be allowed to sport guns, and tacky looking johns should not be allowed to have a gun tucked into their belt either. As a group, Blacks and Whites should not be allowed to wear guns because both are too large a catchall, and will include too many badly dressed, badly groomed, homely, and stupid people. Same for all other groups, Stupid people, of course, should not be allowed to have guns, let alone wear them.
Anyone wearing lycra, unless they are really fit and well-endowed, should be subject to arrest. And even if they are well endowed, certain bizarre color combinations should not be allowed.
Men with annoying reedy high pitched voices should not wear guns and annoying women with low-pitched raspy voices should not be allowed either. Speech coaches can train people to speak attractively. Want a gun? Get thee to a speech coach. And maybe a charm school, too.
Remember what Oscar Wilde said: "Only shallow people do not care about appearances."