This seems, to me, to be the crux of the matter.
From what little I gather, by means of both personal speculation and testament of others, about the experience of some marginalized person, one who has not been taken into account as a subject by whatever mainstream/"master" narrative that defines their social environment; from what I gather about the condition of such ongoing experience, I am willing to equate such marginalization (intentional or not) to suppression.
This suppression, in turn, can, perhaps, be framed as a being-held-underwater, in which case the gradual demarginalization (by means of political correctness?) can be framed as a coming-to-the-surface, the fresh air of which has been reserved, historically, for those who are/have been taken into account as subjects by the local mainstream/"master" social narrative.
In this analogy (and perhaps I am clutching onto it too dearly, at the expense of optimal expression), is the movement upward, toward the surface, represented by the inversion of suppression? Would the marginalized being, by ceasing their censorship of the kind of expression they deem offensive/suppressive; by ceasing this censorship, would they necessarily be curbing their movement upward? Is this a fixed inverse relationship? Does ground gained by the historical non-subject (the so-called "other?") necessarily equate to ground lost by the historical subject? If the historical subject (the oppressor, in certain terminology; capital M "Man," etc.) is the arbitrator of who is deserving of the title of subject, how can this power be shared? Is that possible?
Back to your point, Terrapin: I, perhaps, can address this from firsthand experience, unlike the matters aforementioned. There are aspects of this kind of censorship that, in as far as I identify with the censored subject, carry with them connotations of total invalidation. That is, if I am as privileged as everyone says I am, is there anything worthwhile (i.e. is any of my "success" the fruit of my work at all? Or is it entirely derived from my genetic and socio-economic circumstances?) about my being qua what-part-of-my-being-is-up-to-
me?
Additionally, the accusations of insensitive speech can sting (In as far as you pride yourself on being a good person, I suppose), but I can only assume that such speech stings
more on the other side. But, if I understand what you are saying, what of the sting felt by the censored? Is it necessary? Does it amount to anything positive/remedial(?) for both sides? Does it only sting until one gets accustomed to it? Again, is the inversion of suppression promising as a solution, or does it merely smolder the emotions accused of being hateful, and cause them to fester and, perhaps, explode, automatically, through a barrel into a crowded area?
Now, that last question, admittedly, reads quite pointedly - but I do see some serious import in it, as hyperbolic as it may seem.
The best answer I have, of now, is to embrace the sting (the post-oppressor as martyr??), and hopefully it will lesson the suffering on both ends - one of which, I feel compelled to point out, has been suffering (in various ways, not necessarily in every way) far longer.
But ^this^ kind of "A (but really B (but
also A (but
really B)))" oscillation can, in my eyes, persist into oblivion.