I feel insignificant, so small, my life is meaningless Niki, dear, you and I are not indifferent. I continue to ask myself these questions regularly. Recently, I have not left my house for 3 days and have remained in bed for 2 of them... concerned that I may wish to end it all.
But alas, I am up and about today and reconsidering lifes many possibilities.
This is not a success story, and we can all grow rather sick of hearing overly positive comments about WHY you should go on, why life is beautiful etc etc. It's all rather nauseating. However, these comments, I would argue, stem from a well-meaning public who, either consciously or subconsciously, feel a moral responsibility to keep you alive - because they worry that we may give up the ghost.
The fact of the matter is, there is no "should" or "shouldn't". No right or wrong. Merely choice. And even then, that "choice" may arguably be the mirage of free will.
However, I digress.
What I will say to you is this: if you are to face the unknown, with the unknown being death, and knowing that you will face death anyway later in life (as we all do), not knowing what lay beyond, would it be better to quickly fade to that unknown NOW, or merely try to enjoy the present, even small things, knowing that that UNKNOWN will come to you anyway, so there is no rush?
Consider yourself the main character of a movie. The film is just starting to get good. Would you wish for the film to suddenly end, fading to black? Or for the main character to persevere, against all odds, at the possibility of finding answers and living a life that is more meaningful to him/her?
You see, by encouraging yourself to stay alive a little bit longer, you agree to experience more of what life has to offer, be it good or bad or a mixture. You also run the risk of becoming a better philosopher, a wiser human being, and opening yourself up to various other opportunities that you wouldn't have otherwise.
If for nothing else, continue on for philosophy. Report back with your findings. This is what I have chosen to do. Let's do it together.